What is the correct ettiquette...

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by wavefront, Aug 30, 2007.

  1. wavefront

    wavefront
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    When your dinner guest's 2 year old starts banging your AV receiver's remote on your coffee table and they don't say a word to him. :eek:

    I heard the banging from the kitchen and after a minute of it went in to find them ignoring him and had to take it out of his hands myself.
    :confused:
     
  2. Steven

    Steven
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    Not sure because if I was in your shoes they wouldn't have another invite again :devil:
     
  3. wavefront

    wavefront
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    Tell me about it, they did the same over dinner, he got down from the table during dinner and started wandering around the house and they just stared down at their plates. He's a cute kid shame they don't just keep an eye on him.
     
  4. Kazuya Mishima

    Kazuya Mishima
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    When my (almost) two-year-old nephew went for a wander and looked like he was going to play with my several grands' worth of AV kit, I expressed polite concern, only to be told by my sister, smiling, "oh, he's into EVERYTHING just now!" She said it with such pride...:mad:

    suffice to say I have since found many suitable excuses not to invite them back again!:rotfl:
     
  5. CFC1

    CFC1
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    Tough one... been in same situation many times with brother-in-laws' kids! :mad: For a quiet life, I've turned a blind eye (if not ear) and tried to hasten their departure.... then given the missus an earful for not having a go at her brother to keep the kids under control.
    Depends what sort of relationship you have with your guests... what do you say though without it sounding petty, bearing in mind that the kid's behaviour is fostered by the parents, who consider that behaviour to be the norm.
    My kids were never allowed remote controls to "play with" until they were old enough to actually use it properly, but my in-laws' kids have all been little *****, if I'm honest, and I have witnessed them throwing tantrums and stomping until the parents gave in and gave them remotes and mobile phones as pacifiers.:eek: I recall one of them at two years old, in a fit of rage, throwing a remote control just past my wifes' head and the parents laughing about it! :thumbsdow
    I'm sorry wavefront, I'm digressing and not really helping you :( ... as I say, It's difficult to know how to handle the situation, particularly if you get it wrong and possibly jeopardise your friendship! ...
     
  6. Steven

    Steven
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    I remember when I was a kid my mum clipped me on the back of the head and told me to sit down and be quiet. Dinner parties were sooo boring

    When I become a parent I will never subject my kids to the same ordeal. Evidently though kids these days make their own fun at dinner parties :D

    CFC is a genius. I did originally wanted to say depends on your relationship; whether it'd allow you to have a quiet word, but lacked the vocabulary
     
  7. wavefront

    wavefront
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    Yeah it's ok it was kind of a rhetorical question to get it off my chest, deep breath - ahhhhh :D They are some distant relative of my wife so I don't feel too bad retreating to my computer and letting her wrack her nerves over what he's going to try and grab next. I just hope nobody lets him near the AV stuff :rolleyes:
     
  8. bullfinch

    bullfinch
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    I would as you did take it out their hands without saying a word, put it somewhere were they will not reach it again, give them some paper and a crayon and simply say "DRAW!"

    And yeah they wouldnt be invited again. Obviously they have no respect for other people's stuff.
     
  9. Steven

    Steven
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    They might draw on the wall though...
     
  10. bullfinch

    bullfinch
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    They'd soon stop when I put their head through it.
     
  11. dBrowne

    dBrowne
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    Lashing it out of his sticky little paw with the curling snap of a bull-whip would be satisfying if inappropriate.

    Bullfinch's first approach has worked for me in the past.

    I have had a kid's party when my eldest was a toddler. When all the dust has settled and the midgets had left, I noticed that someone had pushed in the dimples in the middle of all my speaker cones. Lesson learned.
     
  12. wavefront

    wavefront
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    Please noooooo, :eek: thats one of the reasons I am hoping they keep him away from the AV end of the room.
     
  13. shahedz

    shahedz
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    i hate that. really winds me up when parents dont say anything, When stuff like that has happened i take away the object the toddler is smacking around in a huff to let the useless parents know i am annoyed about it
     
  14. bullfinch

    bullfinch
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    Yeah it's amazing how some parents just don't seem to bother.
     
  15. Knyght_byte

    Knyght_byte
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    my nephew was told by his parents that he was never to touch uncle roberts (me) electric equipment and speakers or he wouldnt get pocket money or presents for 5 years.......he's never gone anywhere near my kit.....heh
     
  16. bullfinch

    bullfinch
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    :laugh:
     
  17. CFC1

    CFC1
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    1. :eek: Alright... what are you after? :confused: :D

    2. I sincerely doubt that to be the case! :)
     
  18. IanWilky

    IanWilky
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    i find the best approach is to gently remove the remote from his sticky mitt and say loudly and slowly:

    "oooh, we'd best take that off you, mummy and daddy won't be happy when they have to buy a new one of those" :D

    gets the message to the parents without the awkward scene! (if they have anything at all about them that is)
     
  19. Alan_W

    Alan_W
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    :smashin::smashin: great solution.

    I have 4 kids and own lots of electrical toys. The kids have never played with or broken any of my kit. They are firmly told once or twice to leave things alone.....and that's it.

    Recently spent an otherwise great family holiday, nearly ruined by out of controll spoilt undisciplined kids running amok while their pathetic ineffectual parents ignored their behaviour and its effect on people around. These are the sort of parents who wring their hands in despair and blame scholls in later years :mad:
     
  20. Mr Incredible

    Mr Incredible
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    The etiquette is that in the absence of parenting you firmly but politely take the offender to one side and make it clear in no uncertain terms that that behaviour is not allowed in your house. It will have the double effect of making your guests embarrassed to the extent that you can even extend future invites but be politely refused, so you're not made out to be the bad guy. 2-0 to the home team.
     
  21. Artie Fufkin

    Artie Fufkin
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    Good reply Mr Incredible. By the way, have you always winked ?
     
  22. Mr Incredible

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    Always ;)
     
  23. Artie Fufkin

    Artie Fufkin
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    My apologies...I'm surprised that I'd never noticed before. You do it well though :thumbsup: .
     
  24. Singh400

    Singh400
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    Yank the remote from him! If he tries it again, try what IanWilky said.
     
  25. wavefront

    wavefront
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    Some good advice there. His mum repeatedly said "he's a little monster" as if resigned to just letting him do what he wants. He wasn't a monster she just doesn't seem to have a clue. My wife said when she was at their house he wouldn't eat any food until his mum gave him ice cream which he happily ate.

    I found out last night that she used to work in a nursery :suicide:
     
  26. TeenSpirit

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    When we were children we were never allowed to touch anything in other people's houses - we just had to sit there while our parents talked to their friends :boring:

    Nowadays, everything is focused around the children - we visit friends and the first thing we do is 'set up shop' for the kids to keep them occupied so we can talk in peace.

    Little more difficult with a 2yr old as you can't expect them to sit still for long - although they should be in a high chair at the dinner table, unable to wander around.

    I would have gone straight over to the child and steered them away, lecturing them that they don't go anywhere near the 'grown up stuff' and find them something interesting and safe to do, like getting the plastic building bricks out or something suitable to occupy them.

    I wouldn't be bothered about offending the parents, you are only doing what they should be doing and in a way I would have pleasure in embarrassing them in to disciplining their child themselves next time. Unfortunately some parents don't seem to notice or care !
     
  27. dakara

    dakara
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    Unfortunately, one of the principal reasons why we have so many out-of-control youths, [of both sexes] in Britain today is the lack of control exercised by their parents, during their formative years.
    The increases in "Children's Rights", where proper and reasonable chastisement, by parents, of their children, is against the law, hasn't helped matters either. :mad:
     
  28. Alan_W

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    Are you talking about the child or the parent?
     
  29. Mr Incredible

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    Good point. Both would be ideal!
     
  30. indianwells

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    Thing is you shouldn't have to HOPE they keep him away! If he heads towards your gear I would just say " I'm sorry but that is delicate and expensive equipment and i'd really rather the little one didn't go near it." If they still allowed him to do it after that......................... well sometimes you've just got to fall out with people.:)
     

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