What confuses you about the opposite sex?

FlagshipDevice

Well-known Member
I don't mean this to be sexist, I know there are women here. But it's fair to say (I think!) most members are male. Ahem. *Gets ready to be shot down in flames* So anyway...

What confuses me most about women is how you can take almost identical situations and hers will somehow be 'different', making it somehow ok!?!?

Need I say more? No chaps, I don't think I do. The minxes lol...

But to be fair to the women that are here, what confuses you about men?!?!
 

rickinyorkshire

Distinguished Member
Not so much confuses me but why do women remember every (bad?) thing you have ever done and bring them up as if they were yesterday!!!

Let a sleeping dog lie does not mean anything to that species from Venus.
 

FlagshipDevice

Well-known Member
Not so much confuses me but why do women remember every (bad?) thing you have ever done and bring them up as if they were yesterday!!!

Let a sleeping dog lie does not mean anything to that species from Venus.

LOL! Yeah kudos they are VERY good at that. Very GOOD at remembering the bad things you've done - very BAD at remembering the good things you've done. :mad:
 

Dancook

Distinguished Member
Not so much confuses me but why do women remember every (bad?) thing you have ever done and bring them up as if they were yesterday!!!

Let a sleeping dog lie does not mean anything to that species from Venus.

+1, ah so it's normal then.
 

Solomon Grundy

Distinguished Member
Bursting into tears and wailing "I'm pregnant" is automatically supposed to mean that they win the argument for that reason alone...
 
D

Deleted member 30535

Guest
'er indoors can go to bed "put-out" with me (very rare occurrence I may add) but wake up and carry on the debate as if sh'e just had an intake of breath. On accasions I'm sure I've drifted off to sleep and woken up in the morning to hear the end of the sentence.
 

Solomon Grundy

Distinguished Member
But hey we still love 'em to bits though right...

...right???
 

eric pisch

Distinguished Member
nothing

i worked out along time ago they change there mind every 30 seconds and basically dont know what they want ;)

providing you walk behind them carrying there shopping bags and hand over the visa card on request and generally do what they tell you life will be easy
 

FZR400RRSP

Banned
My wife's inability to understand male conversations confuses me.
For example, I'll mention I was on the phone to my brother
She'll then say

"So did you ask him about his flat?"
"No.."
"So you don't know when he's moving?"
"...No...."
"So you won't have asked him if he's got a new house yet"
"........No......"
"How's his wife and son?"
".............dunno"
"You didn't ask?"
".....................................No..."
"So what did you speak about?"
"..Football...."
"For half an hour?"
"....Yes..."

Cue tutting, sighing and me shouting "You bloody phone him then!"

:rolleyes:
 

FZR400RRSP

Banned
Oooh, here's another one.
I've organised a night out for a few mates on Saturday.

"What time you meeting?"
"Dunno really..around 3ish maybe"
"Where you meeting?"
"Dunno yet"
"You having a curry anywhere?"
"Maybe"
"Where?"
"Dunno"

She truly doesn't understand how blokes can make 'loose' arrangements!
Women have to have everything organised beforehand.:confused:
 

Cobb

Distinguished Member
Why they lie, cheat and scheme. Why they say one thing and mean another (yet guys apparently can't communicate). Why they never grow up until it's too late, and why on earth do they almost willingly continue to make the same mistakes over and over.

Not all women are like this of course :D
 

Sonic67

Banned
Shoes, needing a new outfit for every do going, choosing the right handbag. Watching soaps, reading 'Hello' magazine, agonising over their appearance, taking hours to get ready, making bitchy comments about friends, not knowing whether their car has front or rear wheel drive even though they drive it every day.

Really how long do you have?
 

Tempest

Distinguished Member
I learned that you NEVER earn brownie points.

Anything nice you have ever done in the past has zero meaning when you do something wrong today.

There's no. Oh he's ****** me off, but in the past he's been so good that I won't make an issue out of it.

Thinking about it, women are just like my boss at work. Does not matter how much work you did last week, the fact that you let him down this week is the only thing that matters.
 

Sonic67

Banned
Oh and 'the silence'. I spend the first half an hour enjoying it. The second half an hour wondering what I've done, finally I ask and I get the answer, 'nothing.' Finally after hours we finally get to the row and I finally find out.
 

Sonic67

Banned
LOL!
Good one.:D
Add 'not having a clue how a car even begins to work' to that list.

It came up when the snow was here. She was worried about driving in it. I asked the woman if she had a front wheel drive car or rear wheel drive. She didn't know but at least knew that it was a Corsa.
 

FZR400RRSP

Banned
I get grief for watching football "all the time"
In reality, it's maybe one or two games a week.
So in total, around 90-180 minutes of football a week.

Meanwhile, she watches 90 minutes of soaps a night....

:mad:
 

eric pisch

Distinguished Member
My wife's inability to understand male conversations confuses me.
For example, I'll mention I was on the phone to my brother
She'll then say

"So did you ask him about his flat?"
"No.."
"So you don't know when he's moving?"
"...No...."
"So you won't have asked him if he's got a new house yet"
"........No......"
"How's his wife and son?"
".............dunno"
"You didn't ask?"
".....................................No..."
"So what did you speak about?"
"..Cars...."
"For half an hour?"
"....Yes..."

Cue tutting, sighing and me shouting "You bloody phone him then!"

:rolleyes:

lmfao i get this all the time
 

FlagshipDevice

Well-known Member
Not taking into account whether they're thinking logically or not, therefore not being sensitive! Yeah, I've had that one in the past...it's coming to you soon too. Blimey... RUN :eek:
 

VXB

Active Member
the single biggest thing that confuses me is how women dont have a concept of time.

lets say we are going out somewhere and have leave home 7.00pm.

Me - Starting at approx 6.00 (earliest) crap, shave, shower, choose outfit (first thing that comes out of wardrobe), iron it, do hair, quick shoe polish....waiting at bottom of stairs at 6.55.

Wife - 9.45am...go get hair done.
11.45 - beautician for nails and other woman treatments.
2.00pm - spend whole hour trying on several outfits (that are in wardrobe and ironed),
3.00pm - outfit chosen, iron it again.
4.00pm decide that original outfit not good enough, try several others,
4.10pm - arguement about how many outfits and shoe combos she is trying on...
4.30 - long shower.
5.00-7.00pm make up and hair (how this takes two hours is beyond me - and she had hair done in the morning)...
7.00pm - start getting dressed.
7.05pm - me shouting from the bottim of stairs "come on, i've been waiting 10 minutes"
7.30pm - come down and ask "do i look alright/fat/nice?"
7.30pm - i answer yes/no/yes (never ever hesitate)

7.35pm - we are both in car
7.36pm - wife forgot something, goes back into house.
7.40pm - finally leave....

...and we only go to the cinema, late for start and watch crap film.....

all day for that....!!!!

I will newver really get it i guess.....
 

Beetlejuice

Distinguished Member
The clitoris - nature's Rubix cube

[Good ol' Family Guy :D]
 

PJTX100

Distinguished Member
+1, ah so it's normal then.

+2


Women seem to have an in-built reflex ability to dredge up all the crap, in chronological order. You really need to be on your toes to bat it all back, and many times you lose the will in the tie break. :D
 
D

Deleted member 30535

Guest
I fail to understand how SWMBO is unable to do the rudimentary tasks of scheduling a recording and subsequent playback of a program on Sky+.

Why SWMBO can't pack a dishwasher properly.

Why SWMBO has to have the central heating at least 3 degrees above tropical setting.
 

PJTX100

Distinguished Member
Why SWMBO can't pack a dishwasher properly.

:D they can fill a full size dishwasher with two dishes, a plate and a small fork.

The dishes will be upturned and fill with dirty water, and the fork will poke through the cutlery basket and stop the washer arm rotating. :smashin:

when they come out dirty, it's your fault for buying "a crap dishwasher".
 

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