I have discovered a speaker cable that is (almost) out of this world! This cable is manufactured in such a way that its crystal structure and associated anti-magnetic properties are optimised. This is done by carefully aligning the manufacturing plant (I cant remember where the factory is - it might be Amnesia) with the magnetic poles of the earth, to ensure that the cable is made in strict alignment with the magnetic north. All the crystals are therefore in north-south alignment. Secondly, and this is why the cable is really expensive, this manufacturing process has to take account of the phases of the moon, to eliminate any negative interference that the moons gravitational field would have on the crystal structure of the cable. This means that cable can only be manufactured for a few hours every fourteen days. Once when the moon is at its highest, the second period 14 days later when it is at its lowest. The cable manufactured when the moon is at its height is more expensive, as its crystal structure is additionally focused by the moons gravitational field, and is less dissipated by the earths field, therefore leading to a finer presentation of perceived signal detail. The cable is terminated with special plugs to ensure the best possible joint between the cable and the plug is made. This is done by the use of silver halide-induced thermal expansion to minimise cable/termination losses. And what are these cables called you will by now be asking yourself? They are branded as Absolute for the 14-day low moon option, Total for the high moon option, and the bi-wire model is Complete this only comes in the high moon variant. To give them their full names they are Absolute Silver Halide Induced Thermal Expansion cables, which can be abbreviated to the acronym Absolute S.H you get my drift!