School plays. I don't have children but as uncle it's a role I've performed occasionally. Sitting at the back, gushing parents. Completely wooden performances by the children. Man with a camera everyone knows is probably there to record it officially with permission but...still it's 2013 and we've nowt to do but get suspicious. Then the palm-bruising moral clap at the end, including to say how 'wonderful' Mrs Mop was for putting it all together.
The only pleasure I get is during the 'refreshments' after, the look on someone's face when I answer 'none' to the question 'which one is yours?'
HMHB said:What about
Nice dive James <clap> <clap>
Great spitting Wayne <clap> <clap>
Excellent lump of snot from your nose to the floor Pete <clap> <clap>
Superb cheating Dave <clap> <clap>
Steve!Stu! Bob! Jim! Susan! Graham!
From a dad that has 2 kids playing football 4 times a week the matches are more like
'Push him back Taylor'
'If he hits you smack Him back Kyle'
'Are you f-ing blind ref-ignore the ref Jordan he doesn't know what he f--- he's talking about'
" you're number 7 is a f- ing cheat you c---, I don't care if she's only 7 you should be ashamed, c'mon Beyonce we're not staying for this s---'
"Don't you find some of the parents behaviour disgraceful Tarquinius, I was talking to my husband you &£@&£( ?&)@! So ?£)&& off!"
James, Wayne, Pete & Dave???????
When did you guys last go to a kids football match...the 70's??!!
Today kids are called
Middle class = Oliver, Zachary, George, Stanley, Alfie, Archy, Rubin, Freddy, Jake, Sonny etc
Working Class = Taylor, Kyle, Kaden, Jordon, Bailey, Tyson, India, Storm, Breeze etc (any weather condition, country or a surname translated into a Christian name will do).
^^ the above is a massive generalisation - no offence intended ;o)
I find that Scottish weather woman annoying when she says "for a fwhee fwhile" - yes I know it's just her accent but it gets on me every time she says it.
BomoLad said:How Starbuck (or similar) are quite daunting to those of us who rarely frequent them. I have to walk in slowly so I've enough time to sufficiently read the contents of the board before I'm served. I order varying things whenever I do go and I've not been able to notice the difference with any of them. They're all vaguely different types of the same coffee it seems. Once I got one which had ice and a lid on it, which was different. But I got to drink it through a straw so I was happy.
The huddle around the counter at the end annoys me too. But funny when two people already there have the same order. I'm always a bit tense in case someone has the same as me and then I go to collect their coffee and they'll think I'm frightfully rude.
Euphemisms for being annoyed.
Gets my goat
Grinds my gears
Pulls my chain
The way you can't just order a large or small coffee in those places, but have to ask for those stupid names like vente.
I ask for the size as I know them 'small, large' etc, and they'll repeat back to me the size in their speak. I usually nod and confirm that's right. It's as irritating as young into a fast food place and asking for a coke and being told 'You mean pepsi?'. Well, yes, fine.
God, and people who sit there and read. Why? Can't you make coffee at home?