Parenting - General Chat

BB3Lions

Distinguished Member
Youtube loves it
Gaming loves it
Wifes phone loves it
Reading fail
Writing fail
Any type of work fail/sulk.

Boy 9.


What have you/do you do?
 

Zaichik

Well-known Member
Our son has just started secondary school. His best and very close friend from primary school has gone to another school so they are trying to keep in contact on WhatsApp during the school term. The problem is that her parents are fearful of technology and online doings and they frequently take her phone away for days at a time. They also read her messages.

The upshot is that, when my son sends her a message, sees that it has been read but doesn't receive a reply, he is left wondering whether she has read it but is not responding for whatever reason, whether she doesn't have her phone and it's her parents that have read it, or whether her parents have read it and deleted it and she won't see it at all. Sometimes, the "last seen" time gives away that it must have been her parents looking, but not always.

He sent her a nice message (and a home-made card) for her birthday, and it has been read, but again there's been no response several days later.

It's making him quite upset because he doesn't want to lose touch with his friend but the current situation isn't really working as he doesn't know where he stands.

I feel really bad for him because theirs was the kind of caring friendship that I never had at school and it would be such a shame if it came to an end.

I'm hoping they will get to see each other during half term and my son will be able to talk to her about it.
 

imightbewrong

Distinguished Member
Our son has just started secondary school. His best and very close friend from primary school has gone to another school so they are trying to keep in contact on WhatsApp during the school term. The problem is that her parents are fearful of technology and online doings and they frequently take her phone away for days at a time. They also read her messages.

The upshot is that, when my son sends her a message, sees that it has been read but doesn't receive a reply, he is left wondering whether she has read it but is not responding for whatever reason, whether she doesn't have her phone and it's her parents that have read it, or whether her parents have read it and deleted it and she won't see it at all. Sometimes, the "last seen" time gives away that it must have been her parents looking, but not always.

He sent her a nice message (and a home-made card) for her birthday, and it has been read, but again there's been no response several days later.

It's making him quite upset because he doesn't want to lose touch with his friend but the current situation isn't really working as he doesn't know where he stands.

I feel really bad for him because theirs was the kind of caring friendship that I never had at school and it would be such a shame if it came to an end.

I'm hoping they will get to see each other during half term and my son will be able to talk to her about it.
How about good old fashioned voice calls? Switch to a messaging system that isn't an anxiety fountain.
 

Desmo

Distinguished Member
Can you not contact her parents?
 

Zaichik

Well-known Member
How about good old fashioned voice calls? Switch to a messaging system that isn't an anxiety fountain.
I think I will suggest he mentions this to her as an option. Like all children of his age, making a phone call seems so old-fashioned to him!

Can you not contact her parents?
I fear that I might cause them to ban WhatsApp altogether which would further isolate them. If we manage to arrange anything for the holidays, I will see how the land lies.
 

imightbewrong

Distinguished Member
I think I will suggest he mentions this to her as an option. Like all children of his age, making a phone call seems so old-fashioned to him!
Can he not just phone her up? "Hi <friend's name> - so how's it going? <conversation>. Bye then - feel free to call me anytime you want to chat."
 

=adrian=

Distinguished Member
I'm looking for a safe for children music service, where my son (8) can listen to his favourite music, but things like gangsta rap or similar adult music is not accessible. One where he can safely explore new music. He has a Samsung Android tablet. I know nothing about music streaming services being old school I have all my music at home. Any recommendations please?
 
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=adrian=

Distinguished Member
Also is there a messaging app, where he cannot be contacted by anybody else except accounts already established?

Let's say I install the app onto his tablet and he has only mom and dad on there (and his best friend), but he cannot contact anybody else and anybody else cannot contact him.
 

imightbewrong

Distinguished Member
I'm looking for a safe for children music service, where my son (8) can listen to his favourite music, but things like gangsta rap or similar adult music is not accessible. One where he can safely explore new music. He has a Samsung Android tablet. I know nothing about music streaming services being old school I have all my music at home. Any recommendations please?
Most will let you block explicit lyrics, although it is only as good as the data. I use Spotify which had this feature.
 

mjn

Distinguished Member
Spotify will let report songs which are explicit.
 

mjn

Distinguished Member
Our son has just started secondary school. His best and very close friend from primary school has gone to another school so they are trying to keep in contact on WhatsApp during the school term. The problem is that her parents are fearful of technology and online doings and they frequently take her phone away for days at a time. They also read her messages.

The upshot is that, when my son sends her a message, sees that it has been read but doesn't receive a reply, he is left wondering whether she has read it but is not responding for whatever reason, whether she doesn't have her phone and it's her parents that have read it, or whether her parents have read it and deleted it and she won't see it at all. Sometimes, the "last seen" time gives away that it must have been her parents looking, but not always.

He sent her a nice message (and a home-made card) for her birthday, and it has been read, but again there's been no response several days later.

It's making him quite upset because he doesn't want to lose touch with his friend but the current situation isn't really working as he doesn't know where he stands.

I feel really bad for him because theirs was the kind of caring friendship that I never had at school and it would be such a shame if it came to an end.

I'm hoping they will get to see each other during half term and my son will be able to talk to her about it.
Do it the old fashioned way, go round her house?
 

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