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New baby arriving in 4 weeks - advice please!

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by MRW, Oct 9, 2005.

  1. MRW

    MRW
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    I'd be very interested to hear from new/recent fathers, our first is due in just under 4 weeks!

    :eek: indeed.
     
  2. Knightshade

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    Don't Panic. My daughter is now 5 weeks old and my wife and I are still alive.
    It is hard, but it does have it's good bits. When you see what you think may be a genuine smile all the sleep deprivation pales into insignificance.
    On a slightly negative note it's well worth setting up a standing order to mothercare..... There's always something you need.
     
  3. mrtbag

    mrtbag
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    My wife and I had a baby girl 7 months ago. The things that seem daunting now, don't take long to become part of daily life. Yes it's hard, but the feelings you go trough make it worth while. Some nights I still sneek into Erins room and just sit and watch her sleep.
     
  4. ianlecompte

    ianlecompte
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    my daughter Amelie is 11 months now,just go with the flow mate,get all the advice and support you can and most of all enjoy.sometimes its real hard(namely when their teething)but as knightshade says,when you see that smile or hear their laugh for the first time thats all that is important too you from then on.
    good luck to you and your wife.hope all goes well,let us know when baby arrives.
    cheers
    ian
     
  5. davesater1

    davesater1
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    My son, Evan, will be one year old on Tuesday. It has been the most amazing year of my life and what everyone has already said is so true that a laugh or even a smile is worth ten times every sleepless night and now figerprint on my plasma.
     
  6. AML

    AML
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    My wife and I are talking about having kids from now on.
    Really looking forward to having our first. (whenever that happens!)
    I think there are always things to worry about, so its best to study up on anything and everything. Lots of good books out there.

    As for my AV stuff, well ill probably mount my TV on the wall out of reach, and keep the rest in a locked room!! :)
     
  7. MRW

    MRW
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    Cheers for the posts - everybody we talk to says the same thing:

    It's hard, but worth it! (Mind you, that's what the wife said 8 months ago... :D )

    The wife has been really good and we already have everything ready (including Mothercare, Babies 'R' Us etc. account!).

    But on a serious note - fingerprints on my LCD screen will NOT be tolerated! :nono:
     
  8. Knightshade

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    Quite right too! Of course for the first few months you won't have to worry. After that.....?
    Guess you could wall mount it or simply tell them not to touch it and enforce it.
     
  9. Dr Diversity

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    Blackout blinds in the bedroom will make the room dark (!) and can keep the baby asleep for longer. When the baby gets up for a feed at night put a warm hot water bottle in the cot. When the baby goes back in it is less likely to miss the mother's warmth and so go back to sleep.

    Get a digital thermometer to tell you what the temperature is at night. Don't believe what your tired body is telling you and crank up the heating to compensate.

    Orange / red baby food stains everything!

    If the baby is fighting to stay awake stroke gently downwards between the eyes to the nose. It is a reflex reaction to close the eyes and the baby may not have the energy to open them again.

    Get a bedtime routine from day one. Bath, bottle, story and bed. Don't have a silent house or the baby will not be able to sleep in any noise. Have a radio / CD going during daytime hours.

    Oh - and enjoy it!
     
  10. AML

    AML
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    Wow, some great tips there!!
    Definately need to remember that stuff!!

    But to be honest it sounds a bit like "messing with your childs mind"!
     
  11. ReggieDaMole

    ReggieDaMole
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    My boy is due on Thursday. Wife is going in to be induced..... :eek: :eek: Don't PANIC....

    OMG

    Got everything ready (I think) but got butterflys already ......
     
  12. richjthorpe

    richjthorpe
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    I've got a 12 month old girl and she's just started to climb up on the sofas. One she can do quite easily because we always sit on that one, but the other is a little higher (Sofa bed) and it has the LCD mounted above it. She had the inginuity to pull a teddy bear rug over and stand on it's head to get on the sofa. I'm now looking at sinking the LCD in to the wall and making a cover to go over it when the kids are in there ! I say kids because my wife is 6 months pregnant with our second child !

    Kids are great. Just keep a level head with yourself, child and wife. It's very easy to let things get on top and then snap in to an arguement. Not only is it bad for you and your wife, it's bad for the children because they are soooooooooo receptive, they see you in a bad mood, they get upset.

    When they are older and crawling (ie able to sit up without falling) don't try to catch them if they fall and also don't start picking them up cuddling them if they've not really hurt themselves after falling. They'll soon learn that the smaller knocks they have aren't worth crying about and get on with it. Also makes them more independant.

    Another idea for bedtime is something called a Slumber Bear. This reproduces the sound of the womb and is sound and movement activated lasting about 5 minutes. I think they are about 30 quid. Alternatively, untune your radio and just have the white noise playing in the room, also has the same effect apparently (Haven't tried myself but friends in NY have tried it successfully).

    Final thing......enjoy ! Every day they will do something new.

    Richie.
     
  13. alscds

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    I agree with Dr D. but remeber no sweets,puddings,juice,sugery foods etc. it may taste like garbage to you but babies dont know any difference. make all your own fresh food. invest in a steamer and some ice cube trays. steam the food no salt etc then freeze in trays and only take out what you need. talkin about steamers us e a steam steriliser very quick and easy.erm!! dont change nappies during the night unless absoloutly neccasary. make sure you get calpol for when baby has injections. you might never use it but i bet you will need it if you havent got any in.
    OH Yeah!! all those busy bodies that say "make the most of your time with them while their still babies, they grow up so fast" guess what their right.
    tell the mother in law its your child not hers thank everyone for the advice but do what you think is right.
    watch out for old ladies ? they stop you everywhere "ooohh isnt he/she lovely looks just like you"
    enjoy it, its great. Ive got 18 month old son who,s into everything and 4 month old daughter who soon will be into everything. Good luck on the day and keep an eye on the mucky end.
     
  14. Dr Diversity

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    Another two things: new borns are babe-magnets!! You will be set upon by every good looking girl you pass. It is the baby, not you, they are intersted in. Rent the baby out to your single mates for, say £10 an hour :)

    Also, aged 6-9 months is when they develop tastes for food. Give them a good mixture of tastes and textures otherwise you will feeding problems when they get older. We met the parents of a five year old girl who still only ate baby jars of spag bol :eek:
     
  15. Dr Diversity

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    And a book to prepare you for the months to come: Toddler Taming : A Survival Guide for Parents by Dr Christopher Green. He wrote it then re-wrote it when he had children. It comes highly recommended by most parents. Pick and choose the bits that apply to you & yours
     
  16. huwg

    huwg
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    Infocol is recommended to ease/prevent wind. give a dropper before feeds as you feel necessary.

    Your life will change, and things will never be the same again. You won't be able to 'just go out', every move will have to be planned with military precision.
    Ever been to a pub and complained that kids are running around?
    Well now you'll complain if kids aren't allowed in. :)

    Don't bring the baby into bed with you to sleep :nono: :lease:

    It is wonderful, and I wouldn't swap it for anything.

    But nothing at all can prepare you for the sleepless nights and the feeling you get when you bring the baby home for the first time - you just sit there saying 'what now?' :eek:

    The good bits outweigh the bad by so much, but it would be wrong for me to say it'll be a breeze. - prepare for midnight trips to asda/tesco etc.

    Congratulations (in advance). :thumbsup:
    (btw I've got 2 kids, 4 1/2 yrs & 10 mths)
     
  17. AML

    AML
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    Just wondering why you think this is a :nono:

    In japan where people sleep on Futons (on a tatami floor) its quite common to have the baby sleep with the parents.
     
  18. huwg

    huwg
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    AML,
    sorry to put a downer on things, but it is a subject very close to my heart

    http://www.sids.org.uk/fsid/question.htm

    Basically if the parents smoke or are very tired (as is usually the case with newborns) it ain't worth the risk, no matter how slight it may seem.

    The human body does have some built in awareness when asleep, but if you are drunk or overly tired, then this wont function properly.
     
  19. mrtbag

    mrtbag
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    We didn't do this, as I've witnessed first hand with my nephew, that once you give the green light they want to be there every night. We had our daughter in a cot in our room for 6 weeks after birth, then it was her cot in her bedroom. At first it was difficult and sometimes felt cruel, on occasions listening to her moan for 15-20 minutes before going to sleep. But now, even though she's only 7 months, Erin knows her cot = sleep. Goes straight down every night!! :D :thumbsup: :D :hiya:
     
  20. Achy

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    Our boy is now 5 months, don't get too hung up on :

    Tears - Expect a flood of random unexpected tears for the first few weeks (from your partner not the baby!)

    Breastfeeding - Breast is best, but if your wife/baby doesn't get on with it then don't stress out about it - raising them on a bottle will be fine.

    Sleeping through the night - some friends may tell you that their baby went through from a few weeks old, the majority DONT! If they're going from 8 - 6 by 3 months then you're doing well.

    I found the first two weeks were the easiest... he slept most of the time, his cries were feeble and he was quite still when feeding, changing etc.

    The next two weeks, he was awake most of the time, his cries got louder and his arms and legs were everywhere !
     
  21. Steven

    Steven
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    Name?
     
  22. DLPMaybe

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    Mine is 7-8 months old. Great fun. Expect to get ill a whole lot more if you put him in Nursery!

    If you have not already buy a video camera. I never wanted one as I so no point in recording myself. Once you have a baby there is lots to record!

    Also be prepared to be so proud and wanting to show your kid off to everybody :D
     

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  23. huwg

    huwg
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    very cute...... but mine are better :rotfl:

    We've forgotten one of the main rules :-
    Our own kids are always cuter than everyone elses.
     
  24. DLPMaybe

    DLPMaybe
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    That is so true. I look at other kids in the nursery and they just look like babies. I look at him and think he is the cutest baby ever! Everybody wins!
     
  25. Toasty

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    My tip, take photos, lots of photos fairly regular. They change so much in such a short space of time that when you look back, even in a couple of years time, you will be cooing with great memories of what you'll be experiencing now.
     
  26. mrmcdean

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    First a couple tips for the big day. Eat a proper meal at every mealtime - you dont know when shes going to go into labour and food was the last thing on my mind when we got to the hospital. If the nurses offer you food / drink take it because it could be a long time before things calm down and you remember it been X hours since you ate / drank. They can also tell if youre looking a little off colour. ;)

    Its also going to be warm on the labour ward so pack something light for you in her bag of essentials just in case you need to change. Lets just say I wish someone had told me about these two before the birth :D

    Read the baby whisperer, or rather get her to read it :D

    When they're very young they pretty much cry for a reason, get yourself a checklist, cross everything off one at a time they will probably have stopped before you get through everything.

    When they get a little older LOCK AWAY EVERYTHING ELECTRICAL - DVD'S ESPECIALLY, not because of danger just because its really annoying when you cant play that game / DVD because its suddenly very scratched. :rotfl:

    Do get a baby monitor but dont jump up at the slightest noise and if you get one with a temp. alarm make sure you can turn it off. Sounds silly / dangerous but my sons room stays a steady 1 - 2 degrees above the recommended level which is fine but we cant use the monitor because every 10 seconds it beeps at you - that can get very annoying !!

    Enjoy it and try to keep calm - you stand a better chance of doing this at first than the mother for obvious reasons.

    PS If you have family close by get out by yourselves once a month or so, you may not want to at first but it makes a hell of a difference to everyone including the baby.
     
  27. MRW

    MRW
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    Wow, the wife and I read these together - some we had heard before, but some really interesting tips we hadn't (e.g. 'warm hot water bottle in the cot' from Dr Diversity)

    We had lots of laughs too!

    Thanks to you all, I'm a regular here so I'll keep you all updated.

    P.S. I can't beleive this is supposed to be a man's forum where we're all supposed to talk about the latest manly AV stuff, but instead we're reading this thread about babies!!!
     
  28. GrahamC

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    Errr... I'm onto grandchildren now... :rotfl:. Today no.3 arrived. :D:thumbsup:
     
  29. Peridot

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    Yeah, Glad to see some practical advice coming through after all that soppy stuff at the start :D.

    I'd agree with nearly all of the posts above and add my golden rule which is to go with the flow and don't listen too much to the so called 'professionals'. Do what you think is right.

    Especially for your OH - don't be taken in by the breast feeding 'mafia'. If it works - great, if it doesn't then bottle IS BEST.

    There, introducing breasts into the subject must get it back into the AV Forums remit :thumbsup:
     
  30. MartinImber

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    Rule 1 make sandwiches

    Rule 2 get some soft drink in (no caffeine)

    Rule 3 eat infront of wife while she is in labour
     

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