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Motivation - I need inspiration!

angelboy

Well-known Member
I’ve been struggling with my weight for well over two decades now. Every time I have a stressful life event I’ll put on a huge amount of weight. I’ve managed to lose a bit of weight over the last few months using a variety of diets but I always seem to fall back into old habits. The one thing that I keep coming back to, the thing that I’ve just not managed to crack, is my head!

So my question is this, what is YOUR primary motivation to want to lose weight AND keep it off? I want to know the thing that burns into your brain and keeps you on track. Something that you picture in your mind to remind you of what you're trying to achieve when you might be at your weakest. Maybe you have a few different things that you try to keep focused on and maybe they change given different circumstances in your life.

If you're not currently overweight or have never been overweight then what's your secret to maintaining your weight and not putting anything on? I'm not specifically talking about your food and exercise habits, more like what's the motivation in your head to keep you where you are - what do you think about or say to yourself to keep reminding you about it?

What motivates you?
 
D

Deleted member 51156

Guest
I’ve been struggling with my weight for well over two decades now. Every time I have a stressful life event I’ll put on a huge amount of weight. I’ve managed to lose a bit of weight over the last few months using a variety of diets but I always seem to fall back into old habits. The one thing that I keep coming back to, the thing that I’ve just not managed to crack, is my head!

So my question is this, what is YOUR primary motivation to want to lose weight AND keep it off? I want to know the thing that burns into your brain and keeps you on track. Something that you picture in your mind to remind you of what you're trying to achieve when you might be at your weakest. Maybe you have a few different things that you try to keep focused on and maybe they change given different circumstances in your life.

If you're not currently overweight or have never been overweight then what's your secret to maintaining your weight and not putting anything on? I'm not specifically talking about your food and exercise habits, more like what's the motivation in your head to keep you where you are - what do you think about or say to yourself to keep reminding you about it?

What motivates you?
I was lucky in the fact that my parents especially my father was very, much into fitness when he was young. All sports Karate, boxing, football, rugby, he participated at a high level, a hyper masculine man. We were encouraged to play for teams, represent school and clubs etc.

On a deeper level my parents became Jehovah's Witnesses, as a young boy, this made me stand out amongst my peers and at times left me open to ridicule. My value was sports, fitness and being athletic, being in good condition and fighting (I fought loads). This mitigated the bullying and gave me personal value, self worth and respect amongst my peers, organisations and even strangers.


So to me, a fundamental part of who i am is to be in good condition physically, literally fighting fit.
It does take discipline though and now as an older man i have to be mindful the mind wants to do what the body cannot. Recovery takes longer and injuries from wear and tear do occur. Diet is a lifestyle, very little bread, pasta, potato, pork meats re bacon etc, biscuits, very little alcohol.
 

KyleS1

Distinguished Member
What is fundamental as well is finding some form of exercise that you enjoy. For as long as I can remember, I flit between different sports. 6 months running, get bored, 6 months swimming, get bored, 6 months cycling, get bored, 6 months squash, get bored. You get the idea.
Recently I picked up a turbo trainer, thankfully before lockdown, and it's been a game changer for me. Combined with the gamification of exercise through Zwift, I'm hooked. Bought myself a new road bike as well, and even now started cycling with a local cycling club.
You need to find something you enjoy and want to get better at, and combine with sensible eating. I don't restrict any foods. If I eat more than I really should, then I'll do a longer bike ride or an extra session on the turbo trainer.
 

outoftheknow

Moderator
I think looking myself in the mirror really motivates me...So when I put on extra weight, I ask myself is this what I wanna look like?
Agreed 100% for me. Turn side on and see the belly, look down and can’t see anything below the belly (and I’ve got big feet :D:rotfl:).

somehow that’s enough to motivate me to do something. I cut the amount of cereal for breakfast in half and that alone helped. A few pounds lost and the motivation builds and I start to look at other meals and (sometimes more importantly) eating habits.

I’m 6’7” and not slight of frame so the up and down isn’t so noticeable. The downside is when I am 132kg (almost 21 stone - see above for mirror look) I need to lose about 30kg (almost 5 stone!) ro get into a range that is only “overweight”. Even then most daft doctors charts say that is obese and I should be under 100kg and preferably 95kg (t ok be simply “overweight ....

the good news is losing even 1 stone makes those views In the mirror look better. I don’t fixate on the amount lost - looking better makes me feel better.
 

angelboy

Well-known Member
What is fundamental as well is finding some form of exercise that you enjoy. For as long as I can remember, I flit between different sports. 6 months running, get bored, 6 months swimming, get bored, 6 months cycling, get bored, 6 months squash, get bored. You get the idea.
Recently I picked up a turbo trainer, thankfully before lockdown, and it's been a game changer for me. Combined with the gamification of exercise through Zwift, I'm hooked. Bought myself a new road bike as well, and even now started cycling with a local cycling club.
You need to find something you enjoy and want to get better at, and combine with sensible eating. I don't restrict any foods. If I eat more than I really should, then I'll do a longer bike ride or an extra session on the turbo trainer.


Great advice.

What motivates you to do what you do though?
 

KyleS1

Distinguished Member
Great advice.

What motivates you to do what you do though?
I don't want to be old and unfit. I don't want to be old and over weight. If you don't start early, it is much harder to get into an exercise/sport and be good at it.
I also have young kids, so I want to be able to do everything they can or they want me to do.
Plus I want to be heathly.
I still eat loads of chocolate, crisps etc. My weight fluctuates, but it's never out of control.
 

IronGiant

Moderator
I don't want to be old and unfit. I don't want to be old and over weight. If you don't start early, it is much harder to get into an exercise/sport and be good at it.
I also have young kids, so I want to be able to do everything they can or they want me to do.
Plus I want to be heathly.
I still eat loads of chocolate, crisps etc. My weight fluctuates, but it's never out of control.
I've worked very hard from a early age not to get old, but no matter how much effort I put in here I am.
:laugh:.
 

mjn

Distinguished Member
Motivation? Find a sport / activity you like and you won’t need to find motivation!
 

pratty

Well-known Member
I've never been overweight, I've stayed fairly active with sports and exercise and eat moderately healthy, and look decent without being overly ripped or buff, without doing any long duration cardio. Currently old sports injuries are currently preventing me from training as I'd prefer, so I'm just doing what I can while trying to rehab and claim back full mobility.

A few things motivate me.

I want to extend my physically useful years as long as possible, and I would be gutted if I ever lost my physical independence. Every so often I check to see to see if I can do a cartwheel and a handspring, I intend to keep doing this with a view to still be doing this at least into my 60s. Bruce Lee said "Running water never goes stale."

I suppose I want to be better than average. And want to be as physically attractive as my genetics permit. There is a beauty to the toned human body, some people get tattoos and turn their body into a painting which is fine, but I'd rather be a sculpture. There's a quote from Socrates saying something about it being shameful for a man being an amature in physical training and growing old before seeing the beauty and strength his body is capable of.

I also have always had an interest in physical culture. I find the history and innovations of exercise interesting so I read a lot on the subject, so I'm learning as I'm exercising. It turns exercise from a chore to a hobby. Training becomes more playful, and by setting performance goals it becomes something more like 'practice', rather than a grueling perfunctory routine that feels more like a punishment.

I enjoy food. I don't go crazy and overdo it but I don't want to entirely exclude the calorie dense foods I like either. So I earn my calories through activity. I tell myself "I'm not scared of calories, calories are scared of me," haha.
 

shodan

Distinguished Member
I’ve been struggling with my weight for well over two decades now. Every time I have a stressful life event I’ll put on a huge amount of weight. I’ve managed to lose a bit of weight over the last few months using a variety of diets but I always seem to fall back into old habits. The one thing that I keep coming back to, the thing that I’ve just not managed to crack, is my head!

So my question is this, what is YOUR primary motivation to want to lose weight AND keep it off? I want to know the thing that burns into your brain and keeps you on track. Something that you picture in your mind to remind you of what you're trying to achieve when you might be at your weakest. Maybe you have a few different things that you try to keep focused on and maybe they change given different circumstances in your life.

If you're not currently overweight or have never been overweight then what's your secret to maintaining your weight and not putting anything on? I'm not specifically talking about your food and exercise habits, more like what's the motivation in your head to keep you where you are - what do you think about or say to yourself to keep reminding you about it?

What motivates you?
And this is why David Goggins is right.
Motivation is crap, it comes and goes. If you want to succeed at something your mentally struggle with, then your need to be DRIVEN.
Just pick a goal (a specific weight, or distance to run, or time to complete exercise in our a weight to aim to lift etc etc) and make it your life's work. Make it your one focus, the first thing you think of every morning and the last thing at night.
Mike Tyson said dedication is doing what you hate, as if you love it...
Chase away all negative thoughts about not being able to do it, and get it done!
 

angelboy

Well-known Member
And this is why David Goggins is right.
Motivation is crap, it comes and goes. If you want to succeed at something your mentally struggle with, then your need to be DRIVEN.
Just pick a goal (a specific weight, or distance to run, or time to complete exercise in our a weight to aim to lift etc etc) and make it your life's work. Make it your one focus, the first thing you think of every morning and the last thing at night.
Mike Tyson said dedication is doing what you hate, as if you love it...
Chase away all negative thoughts about not being able to do it, and get it done!

Written down, it all seems easy and straightforwards - even common sense! - but in practice it's really hard otherwise I wouldn't be where I am.

How do you learn to be driven? In all of lifes chaos and responsibility, how do you put all that aside and have the laser-like focus that driven people tend to have?

People talk about that 'light-bulb moment', an epiphany, that thing that caused them to almost immediately stop what they were doing and go in a completely different direction. I seem to get it for 2-4 weeks then old routines kick in or I get some bad news or stressful situation and I revert to my old ways.

I totally get what you're saying, but I don't get how to do do what you're saying for the long term.
 

shodan

Distinguished Member
Written down, it all seems easy and straightforwards - even common sense! - but in practice it's really hard otherwise I wouldn't be where I am.

How do you learn to be driven? In all of lifes chaos and responsibility, how do you put all that aside and have the laser-like focus that driven people tend to have?

People talk about that 'light-bulb moment', an epiphany, that thing that caused them to almost immediately stop what they were doing and go in a completely different direction. I seem to get it for 2-4 weeks then old routines kick in or I get some bad news or stressful situation and I revert to my old ways.

I totally get what you're saying, but I don't get how to do do what you're saying for the long term.
If it was easy, we'd all have perfect bodies and perfect lives and perfect lives. That's what makes it worthwhile. 😁
 

angelboy

Well-known Member
If it was easy, we'd all have perfect bodies and perfect lives and perfect lives. That's what makes it worthwhile. 😁


....and that's what makes it really hard.

Sometimes, oversimplifying the situation doesn't work as anyone with or involved with an addiction (mine being food!) will tell you.

Overweight - Eat less, move more
Smoking - Don't smoke
Alcoholic - Don't drink alcohol, drink water
Drug addict - Stop taking drugs

The key is the bits in between the addiction or problem and the eventual desired result. That's the hard part. If I could replace a negative addiction with a positive one then I would. I just haven't had my epiphany yet - but I live in hope! I stopped smoking in 2007 so I know I have the power within to do that then I just need to dig deeper and find some more to win the fat battle!
 

shodan

Distinguished Member
....and that's what makes it really hard.

Sometimes, oversimplifying the situation doesn't work as anyone with or involved with an addiction (mine being food!) will tell you.

Overweight - Eat less, move more
Smoking - Don't smoke
Alcoholic - Don't drink alcohol, drink water
Drug addict - Stop taking drugs

The key is the bits in between the addiction or problem and the eventual desired result. That's the hard part. If I could replace a negative addiction with a positive one then I would. I just haven't had my epiphany yet - but I live in hope! I stopped smoking in 2007 so I know I have the power within to do that then I just need to dig deeper and find some more to win the fat battle!
Well there is no positive addictions, only better one's.
People say the starting is the hard part but in not sure about that, being committed is harder for me.

You mentioned in your original post that you've lost some weight recently, but it seems your are worried that you'll stop doing what you r need to, to lose weight, due to the mindset or lack of.
If I could crack this, I'd write a book and retire! 😁
The reason there area so many different self help books and different types of exercising and different diets is because by and large THEY ALL WORK.

What I have found is that whatever you choose has to be two things (meet two criteria) for you personally.

Easy to sustain
Enjoyable

If it is not these two things then you are not likely to stick to it.

So choose your aim/goal (a certain weight or a specific activity etc) then let's talk about how we can make it easy to work towards and fun to do them at least you'll have the best start possible.

We also have to accept that sometimes life gets in the way and throws us a curveball, but you only lose if you quit 😁
 

pratty

Well-known Member
Perhaps you find it too easy to disappoint yourself. Your used to being overweight so it doesn't seem too much of an issue if you lapse.

However perhaps you would find it harder to disappoint someone else. Do you have friends or family that might benefit somehow from your weight loss? Do it for them as well as yourself. For example if you want to have an active life with any current or future children then every time you over eat means effectively lowering their overall quality of life too. You wouldn't want anyone to have to spend their lives pushing you around in a wheel chair etc.

Obviously though you have to be aware this way of motivating yourself is mental trick and a means to an end, don't get too wrapped up in the idea that you end up resenting that other person if you're having a hard time, or if they don't recognise your efforts, that wouldn't be fair to them either.

You also have to match whatever motivation you have with good practical steps. A sudden cold turkey approach may not work so a gradual cutting down may help get the ball rolling. Make deals with yourself, only eat desserts socially, make the bad stuff occasional treats and rewards instead of your standard daily diet.

Do you drink tea or coffee? How many a day and how many sugars? Would switching to sweetener help? Are you taking in calories you don't think of as 'food'? Assuming your not also addicted to alcohol - cut it out, especially beer.

Do some research. Forget what you think you know about food and "healthy food", ignore the corporate marketing, bro-science and old wives tales you hear. And yes while pasta is healthier than fries and fruit juice is healthier than fizzy pop, but just because a food or drink is said to be healthy or at least healthier than something else, doesn't give you the green light to consume a load of it, which is a mistake I know a lot of people make.

Combine exercise with something you like. I get myself up early for work with a routine of
watching an episode of an addictive TV series, or a recorded sports event before work. I really look forward to it so it gets me out of bed at 5am or whatever. I find getting up an hour earlier for something I enjoy way easier than getting up an hour later just for work.

Do you enjoy podcasts and really look forward to new episodes of your favourites? If so make exercise time your podcast time. Go for early morning walks on an empty stomach and listen to a podcast you enjoy. Get a few podcasts on the go so you have a new episode everyday, or go through the archives of a podcast you've recently discovered.
 

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