Love your computer or hate it?

booyaka

Moderator
For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
 

Ed Selley

AVF Reviewer
Ooohh- I must have stepped through a portal into 2001 :p.
 

overkill

Distinguished Member
Ed Selley said:
Ooohh- I must have stepped through a portal into 2001 :p.
Yup. :D
 

booyaka

Moderator
Ed Selley said:
Ooohh- I must have stepped through a portal into 2001 :p.

olden but golden!:D
 

fortean

Novice Member
Warning: The fuel you are about to insert has not been digitally signed.

Please remove the kids. This vehicle is only licensed for one user. Additional licenses can be purchased on-line at http://mycar.microsoft.com/takethekids.asp
 

Dynaudio Desire

Novice Member
"Your car has experienced an error and needs to stop and return where you started your journey.

We are sorry for any inconvenience caused."
 

John 1987

Well-known Member
Never seen that before, it brought a smile to my face.
 

fortean

Novice Member
Free Sunroof download - Validation Required

Imports System.Accessories

Public Class SunRoof
Implements AccMotors

Public Sub ActivateSunRoof(ByVal PushButton As Boolean)
If PushButton Then
AccMotors.Open
Else
AccMotors.Close
End If
End Sub
End Class

System Requirements:
Microsoft GTX - Saloon Edition SP4
Microsoft Visual Vehicle 2006
2 Square Meters of roof, additional space may be required during installation
Administrative rights to the vehicle

Users of SunRoof Beta 2 should uninstall the product first

There are known issues with Norton AntiCarThief and McAfee BillBoardAware.
 

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