John Carter Cinema Review

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Disney takes us to Mars and delivers a head-butt or two along the way!

Written by Tarzan-boy, Edgar Rice Burroughs, way back in 1912, the phenomenal pulp heroic cliffhangers chronicling Civil War hero Captain John Carter’s adventures on the red planet, have been in the DNA of almost every SF or fantasy yarn that has come along since then. Superman, Conan, Flash Gordon, Planet of the Apes, Dune, Star Wars, Stargate and Avatar are the big hitters so colossally influenced by the concepts that Burroughs just hurled onto the page in colourful fever-dream momentum over a series of novels commencing with A Princess of Mars, which Andrew Stanton’s lavish new movie adapts in the more simply moniked John Carter, but the cultural infiltration of his vibrant imaginings has also permeated Star Trek, Doctor Who and He-Man, informed almost all the superheroes we know and love from the comics...


Read the full review...
 
In almost every way, the biggest load of drivel I have seen since the remake of "Clash of the Titans". The dialogue is laughable, the SFX are nothing special and it even has a "comedy" dog like tortoise creature to make the viewer wince even more. Unforgivable rubbish, I urge you to save your money.

Midge:rolleyes:
 
I'm with you completely on this Chris...totally love the film. I have been a fan of the original story way before the source material was used to fuel the imagination of so many modern day Sci-Fi cinema classics. It makes my heart skip a beat knowing that the story has finally made the transition to celluloid. It's a pity the Disney marketing department have no idea how to pitch this Rosetta Stone of Sci-Fi to the general public.

War
 
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Just got back from seeing this. It's a very long time since I read the books but as far as I remember, the stories in both A Princess of Mars and The Gods Of Mars bear almost no resemblance to the one in the film. I know that you can't just film books as they were written, but good grief, the originals were pretty simple affairs yet the one they've come up with is a confusing mess.

Overall I did like the movie but honestly - shape-shifting teleporting Therns with magical, city-levelling ray-guns? Where the flip did that come from? Did Andrew Stanton not actually like the original stories?

I still can't quite get over the shock of the almost wholesale ditching of ERB's plot and the replacing of it with an inferior newly made-up one, so I'd like to revisit the movie when I've had a chance to mentally recover.

However I will say that Lynne Collins as Dejah Thoris was rather tasty, despite being a lot more covered up than in the books. Also my wife understood the plot and liked the film so I know I'm probably suffering from a fanboy over-reaction!

Thanks for the review Chris, even if it was a little short ;)
 
I saw this in Real 3D Friday, loved it and I read the books in the 70's ... this will be a pre-order for sure when it comes up.
 
Thank you a good review, i find myself hoping i will agree with you when i see the film next week.
 
BBC News - John Carter flop to cost Walt Disney $200m
Set to loose 200 million dollars. I knew I was right in thinking it was bloody garbage.

Midge

Big up to you, Midge. Glad you feel justified in your opinion - you should be a Hollywood pundit. You could save the industry millions with such canny foresight. It's hardly something to feel pleased about, though, is it? It's only a film, when all said and done. It was made with the best of intentions, and was a great intepretation of a hugely influencial slice of SF/Fantasy pioneering. That said, Burrough's books were pure pulp and, hey, they even had that comedy dog you winced at. So, guess what ... the film is full of ripe, cheesy old pulp ... and a comedy dog! Which is as it should be, as far as I'm concerned.

You didn't like it and that's fair enough, but you're making it sound like you're gloating about its losses. That's not cool, mate. There are still plenty of people who found it very entertaining and don't worry about its take at the box office. Your sense of personal vindication in its apparant downfall seems very childish.

I could name a whole host of movies out there that I truly cannot stand, but I don't wish any of them to fail. Especially if they are just big, dumb-ass escapist fantasies that want to have fun.

Although this is certainly disappointing news and sounds like a death-knell for any subesquent JC films, trust me, I won't lose sleep over it. Personally, I still really love the movie, cheese, "comedy dog" and all, and can't wait to see it on BD. Go figure.

Chris McEneany :devil:
 
Hey Mad Mac sorry to read you didn't like my post, ce'st la vie. However it wasn't foresight I used it was paying my hard earned money to watch the film. I had actually been looking forward to it for ages, and I like many others I suspect had been sucked into the hype surrounding the project. I cannot agree with your comment that you don't wish any poor movies to fail. I believe that the suits behind them deserve a heads up once in a while. It may make producers think twice before churning out by the numbers products in the belief that we the movie going public will happily accept anything they throw on the screen, but then again it probably won't.

Though I obviously ruffled your feathers I have no wish to fall out with anyone, but I do believe I have the right to comment after all I paid to see the film, 3D and all.
 
Fair do's, Midge. I just thought that you were having a pop for the sake of it. No worries. Of course you're entitled to your opinion.

As I said, it's just a film ... and there's no point falling out over a slice of hokum, is there?

We've always got Prometheus to keep the flag flying. Inspired marketing, audacious story, tremendous visionary director. And possibly an Alien?

I think we can safely say ... it's gonna open big! And I'm sure that we're singing from the same hymn sheet with this one.

Cheers,

Chris McEneany :devil:
 
I saw this last night & really quite enjoyed it but i was well aware that i was watching a 12A... the "comedy" dog is spot on btw & as has been pointed out in its the bloody books .:D I'll be getting this on blu when it comes. It has done nothing to receive the bad press its getting besides being an old fashioned romp on Mars.
 
There are still plenty of people who found it very entertaining and don't worry about its take at the box office. Me i am one.

Although this is certainly disappointing news and sounds like a death-knell for any subesquent JC films, trust me, I won't lose sleep over it. Personally, I still really love the movie, cheese, "comedy dog" and all, and can't wait to see it on BD. Go figure.
Chris McEneany :devil:

Yes the biggest shame of this is there could have been a lovely run of movies from Mars..:smashin:
 
I watched it in 3D and my experience wasn't a good one. I found the picture very dark to be honest, I don't know whether this was due to the post production 3D conversion, or, the cinema holding back on the bulb brightness to prolong it's life? I don't know whether this actually happens or is a myth? But I have heard several people making the comment that this practice ruins the viewers 3D experience in some cinemas.
 
Just finished watching this film on TV and really enjoyed it in spite of all the bad press it received. One thing it did remind me of is Planet Hulk even jumped like the Hulk and a ever so slight bit of Adam Strange one of my favourite comic characters, I wonder as above says it not like the storeys is where they took some of the inspiration from.

I've seen a lot of fantasy films in this vain albeit this is suppose to be sci-fi such as Prince of Persia and 10,000 BC that where in my opinion utter drivel yet made a lot more than there budget, this only 21 million about 8% of its budget.
Probably a big mistake not calling it John Carter of Mars some people may have thought it a holiday film presented by John Carter:laugh:

I also like the mystery of the starting plot that was tied up at the end, I don't know why people did not like it The Matrix was like that for the first 30 odd minutes and then it all slotted into place and look how well revived that was.

I too would have liked to have seen more in the series especially more Lynn Collins what stunning blue eyes.
 
I still haven't watched it yet. I think Disney have already sold the rights on to Warner as it didn't do to well.
 
I watched this as a rental some time ago, and found it a great surprise (given the extreme bad press it received). I for one, would loved to have seen a sequel, especially given the wealth of source material. It just goes to reiterate what most of us already know, box office poison, does not necessarily equate to a poor movie.
 
From what I read list night on the web I got the feel the film did far better in the rest of the world and in particular Europe than the USA, so must have bombed a bit in the USA to make a little bit of £20 million end profit although made £284 million it seems they did not promote it very well in the states.
As to Mark Kamode review in the BBC News link one thing I have to say he's a very good guide for me as 90% of the time I know what ever he likes I wont and vice versa and the clip that shown how bad the film is I found nothing wrong at all.

Although I found bits reminiscent of other things like the wedding but if originally in the books predates a lot of other stuff that's used the same plot.
Avatar the highest grossing film, has a plot the same basic plot of other films.

You can never predict 100% how a films going to do Deep Rising bombed and look how many people on the forum love it. Yet Alien 4 with a sort of a similar plot that lacks Deeps flare and generally not liked here made a 2-2.5 times more back than its budget.
 
You can never predict 100% how a films going to do Deep Rising bombed and look how many people on the forum love it. Yet Alien 4 with a sort of a similar plot that lacks Deeps flare and generally not liked here made a 2-2.5 times more back than its budget.
Looks like Transformers 4 will finish the year as the highest grossing film of 2014 (Worldwide).
Says it all really...:(
 
I just watched the video below and seems Disney killed it before it even got released and rather than rescue it helped its demise.

BTW to the above comment being too dark in 3D I watched it many times with active glasses which are suppose to be darker than the passive and never felt it was too dark so if it was dark it was the cinemas.

 
Loved it myself and it didn't have a bad ending either (Although it could have been a couple of minutes longer for complete satisfaction.

You can never predict 100% how a films going to do Deep Rising bombed and look how many people on the forum love it. Yet Alien 4 with a sort of a similar plot that lacks Deeps flare and generally not liked here made a 2-2.5 times more back than its budget.

Pretty much why I don't pay any attention to review sites, not to mention that people only the last couple of years are reviewing things such as Police Academy and comparing them to current world statuses and views.

Still a classic today and so many critics bashing it.

Edit
Just a little untruth to my above comment about review sites, I tend to visit ones with spoilers for endings before I decide to watch a movie.
 
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I just watched the video below and seems Disney killed it before it even got released and rather than rescue it helped its demise.

BTW to the above comment being too dark in 3D I watched it many times with active glasses which are suppose to be darker than the passive and never felt it was too dark so if it was dark it was the cinemas.



Yeah that video popped up for me and watched it last week. The film was doomed with how the execs shafted it, such a pity as I seem to remember rather enjoying it. A very well made space opera.
With regards to the 3D when watching at home I use a brighter video setting for 3D stuff and never have brightness issues except with those very dark moody films which should never have been 3D in the first place.
 

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