Being stalked by a woman.
This isn't funny. I tried to be nice and friendly to a woman at work and now she is effectively stalking me . I did nothing other than be civil and polite and understanding...include her with other colleages in having out of work lunches and drinks and generally get her to be a little less self concious and self obsessive and now she is making my life misery because she seems to think the only reason I don't want things to go further is because I'm married with children.
I had almost exactly the same thing happen to me 10 years ago when I was at college again trying simply to be nice to someone who was generally perceived as a bit of an oddball by their peer group. The person in that particular instance didn't stop stalking me for about 2 years until I was in a very stable relationship with the woman who has been my wife for the last 8 years.
I've tried to bolster her self confidence rather than tell her to go away and ignore her ( I'm not an arsehole) but she knows in no uncertain term that I'm happily married with kids and am not interested in a relationship with her beyond the normally very good , trusting , and even compassionate relationship I have with pretty much all my long term colleagues.
Yet still she persists and correspondingly tries to flirt with me and then make me feel guilty that I'm a married man with children and shouldn't even engage her in conversation. She is now trying to burden me with how damaged she has been from past relationships and how this will ultimately prevent her from forming any lasting relationship with me. Thing is though I've told her I'm not interested and she just says she understands I have to be selfless because of my wife and kids.
I can't win here. I feel like I've got tangled up with a nutter just because I was a bit nicer than the other vacuous twerps who have a pop at anyone who seems less confident than they are.
Example...tonight I'm having a few beers with some colleagues and she is around and she darts between telling me a sob story about how nasty her life has been ( without actually tellng me she has anything more difficult than anyone else to deal with... and as if that's justification for harassing me anyway) and then accusing me of leading her on an then ignorng me for 30 mins stealing my fags then playing with my hair behind my back as I talk to other people. Then insisting on giving me a rather passionate kiss and following me outside the pub to wave goodbye as I leave.
edit: oh yeah she also came up to me during the evening and ripped the buttons off my t-shirt without warning and for no aparrent reason.
I'm not Brad Pitt and I'm not some weirdo who gets a kick out of this either.Why does this happen to me?
help .... my life is complex enough without this sort of nonsense.
This isn't funny. I tried to be nice and friendly to a woman at work and now she is effectively stalking me . I did nothing other than be civil and polite and understanding...include her with other colleages in having out of work lunches and drinks and generally get her to be a little less self concious and self obsessive and now she is making my life misery because she seems to think the only reason I don't want things to go further is because I'm married with children.
I had almost exactly the same thing happen to me 10 years ago when I was at college again trying simply to be nice to someone who was generally perceived as a bit of an oddball by their peer group. The person in that particular instance didn't stop stalking me for about 2 years until I was in a very stable relationship with the woman who has been my wife for the last 8 years.
I've tried to bolster her self confidence rather than tell her to go away and ignore her ( I'm not an arsehole) but she knows in no uncertain term that I'm happily married with kids and am not interested in a relationship with her beyond the normally very good , trusting , and even compassionate relationship I have with pretty much all my long term colleagues.
Yet still she persists and correspondingly tries to flirt with me and then make me feel guilty that I'm a married man with children and shouldn't even engage her in conversation. She is now trying to burden me with how damaged she has been from past relationships and how this will ultimately prevent her from forming any lasting relationship with me. Thing is though I've told her I'm not interested and she just says she understands I have to be selfless because of my wife and kids.
I can't win here. I feel like I've got tangled up with a nutter just because I was a bit nicer than the other vacuous twerps who have a pop at anyone who seems less confident than they are.
Example...tonight I'm having a few beers with some colleagues and she is around and she darts between telling me a sob story about how nasty her life has been ( without actually tellng me she has anything more difficult than anyone else to deal with... and as if that's justification for harassing me anyway) and then accusing me of leading her on an then ignorng me for 30 mins stealing my fags then playing with my hair behind my back as I talk to other people. Then insisting on giving me a rather passionate kiss and following me outside the pub to wave goodbye as I leave.
edit: oh yeah she also came up to me during the evening and ripped the buttons off my t-shirt without warning and for no aparrent reason.
I'm not Brad Pitt and I'm not some weirdo who gets a kick out of this either.Why does this happen to me?
help .... my life is complex enough without this sort of nonsense.