Fifty Shades of Grey AVForums Review

Steve Withers

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This pointless tale of sex and power is lacking raunch but full of product placement, making it feel like a two hour advert with a bit of spanking.

Of course I'm a man and thus not the target audience of the film or the original source novel, so let's get a different perspective from that rarest of AVForums contributors - an actual woman.

Read the full sexy review here
 
As soon as this was announced you just knew it would be a pile of crap.

It will make an absolute fortune box office takings wise which is why Hollywood made it.

Hollywood simply CANNOT make this type of film FULL STOP.

An independent should have made it and pushed the NC17 rating to the limit, but as we all know, it just wouldn't make the money that this will.
 
On Friday I couldn't really decide whether to go to the cinema to see this movie or visit the dentist for a root canal...

I'd forgotten what a nice guy my dentist is !
 
This is one of those films where I watched the trailer (it was all over social media, so after ignoring it at least 20 times i took a peek) and knew it was going to be awful.

It looked a lot like twilight with money instead of blood from the trailer, All those swooning and moody looks make my gut churn! :laugh:
 
Mrs and her m8ts went to see it on Fri night and said it was a load of pap. They marketed it as edge of your seat raunch and she said it was about as tame as Disney film. They spent more time laughing and couldn't believe the way it ended.
 
Just goes to show crap sells. You'd think it was the second coming with the hysteria. I'd rather gauge my eyeballs out with a red hot spoon than watch this. They say sex sells lol. Reading the reviews the salvating fans would of been better tucked up in bed with a cup of cocoa watching porn for £0
 
Sounds like Frozen with Spanking ....at least that had a few good/annoying songs

Let it Go, Let it Go
 
This is top of my "Films I Don't want to See" list at the moment.
 
I saw it and it's not that bad. True, it's not a classic but I've seen much worse. Jamie Dornan doesn't fully convince and the dialogue is at times unintentionally hilarious, but it's watchable if thin on characterisation. (Come on though, that's not what this film's about.)

The sex scenes are a bit tame but that's to be expected for a mainstream film. Keep an open mind and catch it on Netflix or some other subscription based service. I really have seen worse!
 
As soon as this was announced you just knew it would be a pile of crap.

It will make an absolute fortune box office takings wise which is why Hollywood made it.

Hollywood simply CANNOT make this type of film FULL STOP.

An independent should have made it and pushed the NC17 rating to the limit, but as we all know, it just wouldn't make the money that this will.

This.

There are far raunchier films being made and this needed to be one of them. Hollywood was chasing the money.

It's not like there are millions going to see this and not read the books. The books let nothing to the imagination so fans knew exactly what was going to happen so be ADULT about it.

The real problem I have is this though.

It is a very adult book and so should film have been right? So just stop and think for a minute about what Hollywood is thinking

They made this an R rated film to get bums on seats. They wanted too make raunchy film so people UNDER 17 can go see it.....WITH AN ADULT?????! Which adults are we talking about? A teenagers Mum and Dad??! Eeeew.

I cannot understand why the author forced everyone to use the same (awful, awful) dialogue in book as if she were so proud of them, but was OK turing into something less raunchy than Babe TV.....so I'm told.

I think she sold the rights for $5m plus royalties. I'm almost 100% certain she could have made the same inc royalties by taking it to an independent and making it a far more adult oriented. The book was a sexual escapism and so should the film have been. Instead it's just a romance with some rude bits it.
 
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Your better of watching:-

Secretary
9 1/2 Weeks
Fatal Attraction
Disclosure
Sliver
Basic Instinct
Indecent Proposal
 
Your better of watching:-

Secretary
9 1/2 Weeks
Fatal Attraction
Disclosure
Sliver
Basic Instinct
Indecent Proposal
Spot on mate.
Nearly $250 million opening weekend worldwide.
 
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I know of a "mature" woman - by mature I mean on the threshold of a pensioner - who went to see it with her grand-daughter!
 
I know of a "mature" woman - by mature I mean on the threshold of a pensioner - who went to see it with her grand-daughter!
Lovely stuff, I like to see families 'coming together' hahahahahahah
 
You dont go to Hollywood for sexually charged dramas,you go to Almodovar,Medem,Ozon,etc.The content in their movies is shocking by Hollywood standards,yet never exploatative,gratitious and over the top in the context of the story.

If this is indeed worse than Adrian Lyne's crap,just wow.And i don't think that NC-17 is absolutely needed to make a movie like this," The Skin I Live In" was rated "15" in UK and it is probably much more perverse than this pseudo-BDSM "fan-fiction".
 
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I think 50 shades will probably do a lot of business when it is released on home format as I bet quite a few women who want to watch it will probably feel a sigma going to watch it at the cinema especially if alone. They've probably read the book and want to see what the film is like.
 
Fret not. In a couple of weeks nobody will even remember this clunker was ever made :)
 
Unfortunately it made $240 million in its opening weekend, so it looks like it will be a monster hit and there will definitely be a sequel. Don't forget there are three books - God helps us!
 
Hopefully it will be rebooted ... with heels! :devil:
 
The reason it did so well (commercially) was all the hype. Happens time and time again with lacklustre blockbusters.

Anyone who was expecting a movie with an Ellie Goulding song on the OST to be in any way genuinely erotic needs a reality check!

I'm looking forward to the one by Paul Verhoven written by the makers of Baise-Moi.
 
It's probably not as bad as avatar which once you set aside the visuals is probably the worst block buster of the lot and they are making 2 more of those
 

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