Embarrassing admissions

HMHB

Distinguished Member
I have owned my 54 reg car from new and the only times I've opened the bonnet is when I've been filling up the windscreen washers.

I have never checked any of the other levels and actually couldn't tell you where the dipstick is without having a look first.

Having said that, I only do about 6,000 miles a year and I have it serviced every year.
 

Pisto_Grih

Distinguished Member
I sneak round peoples houses and secretly drain clutch fluid from their cars.
 

gus607

Active Member
Thats OK but if your car develops a small oil or fluid leak etc, you could end up with a very large repair bill. Replacement engines don't come cheap !
 

HMHB

Distinguished Member
The car isn't worth much anyway now and I'm just running it until it expires :)
 

Exemplar

Banned
I'm ginger...
 

IronGiant

Moderator
I mis-read the thread title as "embarrassing emissions"
 

RugbyAl

Well-known Member
I mis-read the thread title as "embarrassing emissions"

I once trumped at school (which sounded like someone treading on a duck) in front of 15 or so class mates whilst the wood work teacher had us stood around watching him saw a dovetail. When the sniggering stopped, he had the last laugh by making us get our text books out instead of doing practical. My red face gave me away for detention allocation!
 
A few days ago I broke wind in Asda. Not only that I did it in such a way that an innocent old fella got blamed for it. I could feel it brewing and casually meandered away from the missus and proceeded to let go in a clear area of the aisle. I then moved away secure in the knowldge that no one would would ever know. Just then a old man and his daughter and grandaughter appeared round the corner and entered the area I had floated said air biscuit. The daughter just turned and said "Dad, for gods sake" while his grand daughter just laughed while she chanted "Poops" while pointing at him. I felt his pain, but not enough to front up to it obviously.
 

mjn

Distinguished Member
I once stole 8 pairs of women's knickers.
 

Greg Hook

Moderator & Reviewer
I've owned my Jag for 13 months now and washed it for the first time last month.
 

rousetafarian

Moderator
I have owned my 54 reg car from new and the only times I've opened the bonnet is when I've been filling up the windscreen washers.

I have never checked any of the other levels and actually couldn't tell you where the dipstick is without having a look first.

Having said that, I only do about 6,000 miles a year and I have it serviced every year.

Similarly, heed my warning....I ventured under the bonnet once and attempted to fill the oil up via the dipstick opening not the oil filler cap.
 

snaithg

Well-known Member
I've owned my Jag for 13 months now and washed it for the first time last month.

I'm catching you up! 10 months and no wash yet!


Graham.
 

BB3Lions

Distinguished Member
When single, I was once so drunk i went for a fish supper (children friendly forum) and came up with a smile and thinking good job man, however she cringed, i wondered ??? she vomited, i was shocked. I went into the bathroom to find i have the red ring of fear around my mouth, cheeks, chin and down my neck. Being drunk i washed up, vomited a little myself and went back in with a smile (she was pretty cute), she was fully dressed and ready to go.

We chatted for a bit then i bit into something and blood splurted everywhere (think chewing gum with the juicy centre), she was out the door so quick i don't know why. Saved me a taxi bill!

yum!
 

raduv1

Distinguished Member
When i liveed at home I came home drunk one night and went to bed. My Mum awoke to hear running water and got up to see where it was coming from. Sad to day it was coming from me...still asleep standing at the top of the stairs stark naked peeing down them :love:. i also woke up one time with a cracking bruise to half of my face to find out that id tried to get into my brothers bed while sleepwalking and he had thrown a hard back book at me :confused:.
 

shodan

Distinguished Member
I enjoy musicals...
 

blue max

Distinguished Member
When i liveed at home I came home drunk one night and went to bed. My Mum awoke to hear running water and got up to see where it was coming from. Sad to day it was coming from me...still asleep standing at the top of the stairs stark naked peeing down them :love:. i also woke up one time with a cracking bruise to half of my face to find out that id tried to get into my brothers bed while sleepwalking and he had thrown a hard back book at me :confused:.

I once pee'd into the linen basket. My wife woke me to enquire why, but I had no idea at all!

Must mean something, but I'm blowed if I know what :)

Also was so drunk that I couldn't find the tube in Euston station, so got a cab. Clue: it's not hard to find a tube station!
 

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