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Education - Children's Science

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by la gran siete, May 29, 2005.

  1. la gran siete

    la gran siete
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    If you need a laugh, read through these Children's Science exam answers. These are real answers given by real children.

    Q: Name the four seasons.
    A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

    Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
    A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

    Q: How is dew formed?
    A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

    Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
    A: Keep it in the cow.

    Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
    A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon,and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

    Q: What are steroids?
    A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

    Q: What happens to your body as you age?
    A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

    Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
    A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

    Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
    A: Premature death.

    Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g.,abdomen.)
    A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

    Q: What is the fibula?
    A: A small lie.

    Q : What does "varicose" mean?
    A: Nearby.

    Q : Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
    A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.

    Q: What does the word "benign" mean?'
    A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
     
  2. PoochJD

    PoochJD
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    Hi,

    Very funny, but this must have been a "fake" set of answers! I can't imagine any real children writing these on a real exam paper.


    Pooch
     
  3. GalacticaActual

    GalacticaActual
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    quality,
    and with working with over 1000 children a day, I can well belive it! :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
     
  4. Mroizouk

    Mroizouk
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    Yeah, im not convinced either. Amusing, but that set of answers is very well cirulated on the net.
     
  5. squirrely

    squirrely
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    Once when i used to work with rubber;) it was my job to teach this young chav his first job,basically cutting strips of rubber to a measured size, i asked him if he "had much experience with rulers" and his reply was "what like the Queen":suicide::suicide: after that nothing amazes me.
     

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