divorced at last

basserphil

Well-known Member
You should write a book about it (use a pen name), quite a story.

Maclover, im pretty sure nearly all married men do NOT understand how the legal profession automatically sides with the female...even when they are at fault...and they will split you from your kids for no reason at all and charge you a fortune in the process.......a story...well the legal profession would be very unimpressed by it, cant name names then....lol
 

maclover

Active Member
Maclover, im pretty sure nearly all married men do NOT understand how the legal profession automatically sides with the female...even when they are at fault...and they will split you from your kids for no reason at all and charge you a fortune in the process.......a story...well the legal profession would be very unimpressed by it, cant name names then....lol
I don't doubt it.
You could use fictitious names - maybe one for your retirement?
 

Marv

Member
A guy i worked with got put through the ringer by his wife with the authorities all on her side. Until the truth came out, case was thrown out of court and then the law sided with him finally. The annoying thing is she has never been arrested or charged with anything since.

He'd been married 18 years had five kids with her, two of which were just about to start secondary school. He worked full time she hadn't work since having the first child and was'nt interested in finding work so she took care of the bills, shopping etc.
One year about a month before Christmas, the bailiffs turned up out of blue because the rent hadn't been paid for 6 months so they were evicted to a hotel for a couple of weeks. Luckily the people we worked for were kind and bailed him out.
I said to him at the time i dont think many employers would pay off your rent arrears for you.

Turns out his wife had been spending money on who knows what and hiding all the rent letters and bank statements so he had no clue they were in trouble.
A year goes by and it was the summer holidays he got home from work one day and his wife and kids were gone and he had no clue where they were.
His lovely wife had called the social services and told them that he had been attacking her so they came round took them away and put the in a safe house. She also conveniently empytied his bank count before she left.

So over the next three months he had to have police interviews and meeting with social services. Where it was discovered that his wife had two Mobil phones and had been going off to meet men while he was at work. Someone from where we worked had seen her dolled up in the high street waiting for a taxi and on another occasion his brother had seen her waiting at the train station to meet someone (which she later admitted)

Anyway the case gets dropped for lack of evidence so he can finally see his kids again. She decides she dos'nt want to move back home so she gets re homed about an hour away by train with all the kids and even gets given a £3k crisis loan!!
This goes on for a few more months with mate getting to see his kids at weekends. He tells me the house is abit of a dump and the kids are all sleeping on air beds his wife bought a cat and its sh*tting all over the house. The kids are not going to school either because they've moved and its term time, its taking a while to get them into school.
From there three of the kids finally move back in with there dad and the other two stay with there mum.
Who once again dos'nt pay the rent and gets evicted again and moves again. This time to a flat over a shop owned by some guy she met. Another child comes back home so now its just the mother one daughter living in this crumy flat.
One day he txts and says his wife just txt him she's moving out of the flat and coming back home. Talk about awarded!!
But at least the family's back together for Christmas.
Two months after Christmas she moves away again and in with another guy she's met. Which gets the social services involved again and it turned out that they have suspicion that the wife might have been selling the one daughter for sex to try and pay the rent!! So they children get a child protection order placed on them meaning she cant see them or come near the house,if she does she can get arrested.
To wrap up this story, the guy she moved in with moved out!! so she had been txting another guy who lived right at the other end of the country, 8 hours by couch. She packed up and moved in with him.
This was probably 5 years ago and she still claims the child benefit now and again even though she never see's the kids.

And with all that she was never arrested or charged and it amazed me that she was able to claim the child benefit on two occasions. Then my mate has a right nightmare trying to get the benefit back in his name again. They backed payed him almost £4k in child benefit the first time she did, she was claiming it that long.
 

basserphil

Well-known Member
Thanks Marv, i cannot in all honesty say im not surprised by the action of all those bodies and departments, females can accuse us of anything at all and a battalion of legal know how will create so much trouble and unhappiness, the term no smoke without fire is the 1 that really grinds. The legal profession should hang their head in shame, they go to florida on my money...that i didnt want to give them, instead of my kids.....wrong just wrong.
 

mjn

Distinguished Member
A guy i worked with got put through the ringer by his wife with the authorities all on her side. Until the truth came out, case was thrown out of court and then the law sided with him finally. The annoying thing is she has never been arrested or charged with anything since.

He'd been married 18 years had five kids with her, two of which were just about to start secondary school. He worked full time she hadn't work since having the first child and was'nt interested in finding work so she took care of the bills, shopping etc.
One year about a month before Christmas, the bailiffs turned up out of blue because the rent hadn't been paid for 6 months so they were evicted to a hotel for a couple of weeks. Luckily the people we worked for were kind and bailed him out.
I said to him at the time i dont think many employers would pay off your rent arrears for you.

Turns out his wife had been spending money on who knows what and hiding all the rent letters and bank statements so he had no clue they were in trouble.
A year goes by and it was the summer holidays he got home from work one day and his wife and kids were gone and he had no clue where they were.
His lovely wife had called the social services and told them that he had been attacking her so they came round took them away and put the in a safe house. She also conveniently empytied his bank count before she left.

So over the next three months he had to have police interviews and meeting with social services. Where it was discovered that his wife had two Mobil phones and had been going off to meet men while he was at work. Someone from where we worked had seen her dolled up in the high street waiting for a taxi and on another occasion his brother had seen her waiting at the train station to meet someone (which she later admitted)

Anyway the case gets dropped for lack of evidence so he can finally see his kids again. She decides she dos'nt want to move back home so she gets re homed about an hour away by train with all the kids and even gets given a £3k crisis loan!!
This goes on for a few more months with mate getting to see his kids at weekends. He tells me the house is abit of a dump and the kids are all sleeping on air beds his wife bought a cat and its sh*tting all over the house. The kids are not going to school either because they've moved and its term time, its taking a while to get them into school.
From there three of the kids finally move back in with there dad and the other two stay with there mum.
Who once again dos'nt pay the rent and gets evicted again and moves again. This time to a flat over a shop owned by some guy she met. Another child comes back home so now its just the mother one daughter living in this crumy flat.
One day he txts and says his wife just txt him she's moving out of the flat and coming back home. Talk about awarded!!
But at least the family's back together for Christmas.
Two months after Christmas she moves away again and in with another guy she's met. Which gets the social services involved again and it turned out that they have suspicion that the wife might have been selling the one daughter for sex to try and pay the rent!! So they children get a child protection order placed on them meaning she cant see them or come near the house,if she does she can get arrested.
To wrap up this story, the guy she moved in with moved out!! so she had been txting another guy who lived right at the other end of the country, 8 hours by couch. She packed up and moved in with him.
This was probably 5 years ago and she still claims the child benefit now and again even though she never see's the kids.

And with all that she was never arrested or charged and it amazed me that she was able to claim the child benefit on two occasions. Then my mate has a right nightmare trying to get the benefit back in his name again. They backed payed him almost £4k in child benefit the first time she did, she was claiming it that long.

That woman is a grade A nut job :eek:
 
And with all that she was never arrested or charged and it amazed me that she was able to claim the child benefit on two occasions. Then my mate has a right nightmare trying to get the benefit back in his name again. They backed payed him almost £4k in child benefit the first time she did, she was claiming it that long.

Unbelievable to see how marriages can turn sour so quickly. I'm pretty sure if it was the man trying to sell his daughter for sex to pay the rent it would rightly end up in a custodial sentence for him.

I've been with my wife for over 20 years, married for 18, have four children and still I'm treated like I'm nobody to the children by child benefit. I phone up and they say they can't talk to me as I'm not the mother.


It's also surprising how the powers that be treat a woman differently to a man. A work colleague found out his wife was cheating on him for a number of years and went to the social for help getting himself a flat as she moved her bit in the side into the family home. He was turned away and told as his name was on the mortgage he would have to grin and bear it and sleep on the couch until it was sorted!!!
 

Marv

Member
That woman is a grade A nut job :eek:

Not only that, she'd accused him of hitting her and she got the kids to right letters saying that he was hitting her. Yet the day before she left the whole family was at the village fair having a nice time. On the way there a car stopped and the wife talked to the guy and she told my mate that he was asking for directions.
But the kids later told my him that the guy in the car was handing her a phone so she could text him back on it. She was also meeting and having sex with men while the kids were in the house after she got re-homed before she got evicted.

I said to my mate later she probably hoped after they got evicted before Christmas that he would leave her but when that did'nt happen she had to think of something else.

God knows what she's told the guy and his family who she's with know. They must wonder why someone would move to the other end of the country and never see there five kids.
 

Thug

Moderator
Husband has an affair "Husbands fault, he is a [email protected] to his wife"
Wife has an affair "husband fault, he is a [email protected] and should show his wife more affection"

I was married for 7 years in a loveless relationship (best friends, just no affection) and I moved out 5 1/2 years ago.
We had no children, only a dog.
At the time it was amicable and we both decided that it wasn't really working so decided to split everything 50/50.
However after talking to someone she changed her mind and decided that she wanted me to give her the family home and £20,000 cash and also 50% of my pension.
I soon moved out and spent several years paying for her to live there and also paying for my own place too. For various reasons I had no choice but to suck it up and keep paying.
We went to MANY mediation meetings, which went something along the lines of her having totally unreasonable requests and me having nothing at all, until we came to a compromise and shook on it (I say shook, but she wouldn't be in the same room as me).
Many solicitors letters went too and fro, usually with her not replying at all or taking literally 6 months in which to do so.
All this time I had not seen my dog (he was my dog as I bought him using my birthday money), most of my clothes, my motorbike and lots of other possessions.
In Nov last year I went and removed my motorbike without her knowing (minus keys and paperwork as she had hidden them) and she reported me for burgling her home (it was my mortgage too so nothing came of that, but it didn't stop her trying to get me into trouble).
I ended up letting her have everything just so I could come to some finalisation and draw a line under it and have my name taken from the mortgage so I could move on with my life.
It was agreed by the courts in January that I could have my tools, clothes and motorbike paperwork/keys as part of the divorce settlement, which she agreed to.
However, 2 solicitors letters later and I am still waiting to hear when I can collect them as she is ignoring them and not replying. The house is now in her name so I cant just go and collect them as she will again report a burglary.
I was informed in February that my divorce absolute had come through in January but they had forgot to tell me.

I invested a LOT of money and effort into this house/marriage as she had nothing before and I had my own place that I sold for a decent profit which was used against our house. For several years she didn't work (made redundant and couldn't be bothered to look for a job) so I paid for everything. I lost everything, but it was a small price to pay to get out of a situation like this.

You never truly know anyone until things go pear shape.

I am now with a lovely girl and we both treat each other with love and respect and plan on getting married later this year.
 
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mikes48

Distinguished Member
I really feel for you mate, (@Thug ) and wish you and you wife-to-be all the very best for the future.

Not going into the details but I had some real sh*t with my ex - even after 28 years of marriage, when I loved her to the end, she took me for everything, and went off with her boss.

Now been happily re-married for 14 years and counting :clap:
 

basserphil

Well-known Member
Hello Thug, yep i recognize a lot of those statements, when 2 people want to part its usually very clear cut and amicable and fair.....then someone tells the woman they must go and get some legal advice?? after this all hell breaks lose, fair agreements are ripped up, the pot is heavily stirred by the office of unfair trading ( solicitors) you end up as a man with nothing for 2 years or longer, your paying 2 sets of astronomical legal bills, if she can get away with it, you'll pay hers , you end up hating each other and your kids are harmed forever.....could it just be possible that the legal advice was to screw the bloke to the floor? I personally asked for a fair settlement 65 % to her , 35% to me....solicitor told her she could get 75-90 %, so the war began and we all lost except the office of unfair trading.i got 35 % by the way ...as i said i paid in excess of £10000, she paid more than that, what was the point??????
 

IronGiant

Moderator
Is it only me that thinks it's weird to say:

"I have a mate who..." and then give that life history in exquisite detail?
 

Thug

Moderator
Hello Thug, yep i recognize a lot of those statements, when 2 people want to part its usually very clear cut and amicable and fair.....then someone tells the woman they must go and get some legal advice?? after this all hell breaks lose, fair agreements are ripped up, the pot is heavily stirred by the office of unfair trading ( solicitors) you end up as a man with nothing for 2 years or longer, your paying 2 sets of astronomical legal bills, if she can get away with it, you'll pay hers , you end up hating each other and your kids are harmed forever.....could it just be possible that the legal advice was to screw the bloke to the floor? I personally asked for a fair settlement 65 % to her , 35% to me....solicitor told her she could get 75-90 %, so the war began and we all lost except the office of unfair trading.i got 35 % by the way ...as i said i paid in excess of £10000, she paid more than that, what was the point??????
I did actually message her saying the only winners here are the solicitors. She replied if I contacted her again she would report me for harassment.
We ended up with an offer I made years ago. She could keep everything and I walk away with my possessions and pension.
 

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