So me , been off work since the beginning of October after a bout of pneumonia where I ended up in hospital for 8 days nd a chest drain in for 7 of them , scared the life out of me when I went to the doctors and as she checked me out she said im getting you an ambulance now !!! , I really didn't feel that bad !!!
Anyway , after a month I felt I was ready to go back to work , despite more than 1 person , qualified and unqualified telling me It was to soon , did it anyway and really struggled despite working short hours , then I made a mistake at work , genuine bit of forgetfulness which didn't cause a massive issue , but I lied to the boss about it , of course I got found out , got reamed out and sent in front of personnel.
Due to the medical issues they have in their own words 'parked' that issue to concentrate on getting the medical side sorted , we have medical cover which for some unknown reason I had never enrolled in , they got me sorted with that and suggested I contacted them for some counselling.
I did a web chat to see if they could help , and after that they offered 10 sessions of CBT , went to the first one before xmas , went ok until she started to poke about a bit and I broke down in tears , never thought that would happen !!! , she has suggested that I don't go back to work until I have seen her for at least 5 times , and with my permission has sent a letter to work stating so.
After that I was going to the doctors , saw her and again burst into tears when she asked if I was ok , that's the first time any doctor has asked me and she said she could see I was troubling by my face , after I told her what the psychiatrist said she has put me on 50mg of sertraline to try and lift my mood which im hoping will help along with the counselling.
Trouble is im really worried about work , its a good paid job and something I am unlikely to match in terms of wages , but i'm not really happy there , its a means to end to be honest and not the sort of thing I fell comfortable with , I like to enjoy my work , and I'm not to be honest.
Anyway , that's enough ramble for now , good luck if you read all the way through it .......