| John Carter
The dull title is a good indicator of the lack of anything interesting in this expensive belly-flop of a sci-fi epic. No, it’s not that bad, but its not good either.
Based on Edgar Rice Burroughs story (the great granddad of all space opera- including star wars), some might say this is immune to accusations of plagiarism. John Carter of Mars, after all, is the original space epic. That doesn’t change the fact that the film is still a turgid, vanilla pastiche of films we’ve seen many times before: Flash Gordon (minus the camp fun factor), Avatar (without the pretty scenery), Dune (but for 10 year olds) and the arena scene from Attack of the Clones (without the lightsabers). Silly, gravity-defying acrobatics, mo-capped aliens plus panto performances from the usual Anglo-Irish suspects: Mark Strong (again), Ciaran Hinds, Dominic West and James Purefoy (complete with eyeliner). There are one or two good action setpieces (the flying fortresses) and it’s acceptable enough in an afternoon-family-blockbuster kinda way- the problem is you’ve probably already seen it.
5/10 Chronicle
Another entry in the ‘found footage/ amateur camera’ sub-genre, and for me just as enjoyable as some of the others. There’s something wonderful about the idea of something fantastical being presented in a wholly believeable way, even if these types of films don’t bear repeat viewings. The only problem with Chronicle is that it’s utterly predictable, and from the moment the protagonists make their discovery the movie is signposted right through to its climatic conclusion. The fantasy/ action also increases at an exponential rate, leading to an ending that could be something out of Superman II. Still, it’s great fun- dark at times- and with some fun moments (the magic show, and the flight scenes are terrific).
7/10
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