British And Proud

[signs]

Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

And the most British thing of all? Suspicion of all things foreign!

Only in Britain can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in Britain do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Britain do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.

Only in Britain do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

Only in Britain do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Only in Britain do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in Britain are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.

NOT TO MENTION..

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 Brits were injured in 2005 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Chrristmas decorations were chocolate.

British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after Xmas cracker-pulling accidents.

18 Brits had serious burns in 2006 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth...

5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out-of-control Scalextric cars.

and finally...

In 2006 eight Brits were admitted to hospital with fractured skulls incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet.

[johntheexpat]

The greatest football teams in the world, but when it comes to getting 11 players together for the national teams.......

[addyb]

Judges give bigger jail terms for tax evasion then they do for violent crimes!

[Sonic67]

Seems like it's a common thing:

http://www2b.abc.net.au/science/k2/s...ic1418991.shtm

3 Australians die each year testing if a 9V battery works on their tongue.

http://www.bebo.com/Blog.jsp?MemberId=3812918847

3 Kiwis die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

Disabled spaces in front of skating rinks are done so that family members can watch, parties can be held there etc.

[Beetlejuice]

Originally Posted by signs

Only in Britain do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.

I do that

but only because I prefer the taste of the diet coke to normal coke!

[danmc_82]

Originally Posted by o Beetlejuice o

I prefer the taste of the diet coke to normal coke!

Are you mad

[signs]

Originally Posted by Sonic67

Seems like it's a common thing:

http://www2b.abc.net.au/science/k2/s...ic1418991.shtm

3 Australians die each year testing if a 9V battery works on their tongue.

http://www.bebo.com/Blog.jsp?MemberId=3812918847

3 Kiwis die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

Disabled spaces in front of skating rinks are done so that family members can watch, parties can be held there etc.

Oh well, it's my own fault for posting it on a public forum , there was always the chance it would get ripped off and altered

[Elmer]

Originally Posted by signs

NOT TO MENTION..

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 Brits were injured in 2005 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Chrristmas decorations were chocolate.

British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after Xmas cracker-pulling accidents.

18 Brits had serious burns in 2006 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth...

5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out-of-control Scalextric cars.

and finally...

In 2006 eight Brits were admitted to hospital with fractured skulls incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet.

By an interesting statistical quirk the numbers killed/injured are also exactly the same as in America and Australia.

It's a little know statistic that 97.35% of facts quoted in such lists are made up.

[Sonic67]

Originally Posted by danmc_82

Are you mad

I drink diet over ordinary as well. I'm not happy about the sugar content of the ordinary stuff. Dentists cost that much I sometimes have fizzy water instead.

[johntheexpat]

Originally Posted by Elmer

It's a little know statistic that 97.35% of facts quoted in such lists are made up.

Actually it's 97.85%