Hi,
With so many other threads being in General Chat, dealing with much weightier issues, I thought this would cheer many of you up, especially if you live in or near London, and have to travel through the nation's capital. This story was on the news last night, and should be in most of today's papers, but is reported here, because it's funny as hell!
Ms Emma Clarke, 36, is a name most of you won't have heard of. However, if you use (or have used) the Tubes in the past few years, you will have been in contact with her on multiple occasions. Ms Clarke is the female tannoy announcer for London Underground (L.U.). The voice, known to millions of commuters as the one who reminds travellers to "Mind the gap", has been dismissed from her job by L.U., after they claimed she made derrogatory remarks about the service on her website and in the press.
In fact, Ms Clarke works as a voiceover artist, from her home in Altrincham, Greater Manchester, and one of her job contracts is with L.U. Ms Clarke recently created her own website, available here, on which she asked what spoof announcements might commuters like to here actually being broadcast over the tannoy system. When she "voiced" the numerous comedic responses, purely for her site, and was interviewed about here work by a newspaper, London Underground bosses took an instant disliking to one specific comment, in which it is claimed she was said to have stated that the Northern Line was rubbish.
Yesterday, Ms Clarke only discovered that her job with L.U. was terminated, via the media reports about her website. She has since contacted L.U., but they are refusing to talk with her.
Sadly, though her website is active, it is currently buckling due to customer demand for the various MP3 files, that show her darkly humourous take on usage of the Tube system. Some of her spoof announcements included:
"Would the passenger in the red shirt pretending to read the newspaper but who is actually staring at that woman's chest please stop?! You're not fooling anyone, you filthy pervert!"
"We would like to remind our American tourist friends that you are almost certainly talking too loudly"
"Passengers are reminded that like all voiceover artists, I probably look nothing like you imagine and may turn out to be somewhat of a disappointment"
Hopefully, Ms Clarke's recent job loss won't be a major setback to her career or her family.
The story, in full, can be found
here!
Pooch
ADDENDUM 1: I've found a working link, to all (or at least most) of her MP3 London Underground spoofs. Just click on this link
here, and then listen to the relevant files.

Sadly, not downloadable to a suitable location on your PC!
ADDENDUM 2: Here's a link to five of the spoofs, that are (hopefully) downloadable as MP3 files. Just go
here! Enjoy!