[partyweb]

Hi all,

Let's hear all your views on the Xmas season, whether you're religious or not. What do you look forward to, or dread. Are things too commercialised or do you just revel in all the glitter, lights, and general joyous spirit that December brings.

Also without being offensive lets hear all those seasonal jokes (and I don't mean the ones you find in the crackers). And any weird and wonderful stories of past years.

[partyweb]

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

"In honour of this holy season," Saint Peter said, “you must each possess something which symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle", he said.

"You may pass through the pearly gates" Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."

Saint Peter said "You may pass through the pearly gates".

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

The man replied, "These are Carols."

And So The Christmas Season Begins......

[meansizzler]

I don't celebrate it, so i hate the fact all the shops are closed on that day...., still great time to surf online or game online as there is hardly anyone about...

[Fusewire]

The man replied, "These are Carols."

Eating, drinking, days off work, new toys....

Bring it on.

[dennis]

bah! bumhug!......errr i mean humbug.
nah i like it still, christmass day all by meself (dont it just break your heart)glass of port or two,or three,turkey sarnies ,nuts.the over to my bruvvers for boxing day,cant wait.

[CFC1]

Yeah ... Bring it on ...... Hic!

[ufitsy]

Last year, was there not a site with Christmas elves on that we could customise with your own photos?

[dennis]

here you go

http://www.elfyourself.com/

[johnscarlet]

Its too early for Chrimbo , come back next week . Closing . lets see how many of you bite

[Mep]

lol

[partyweb]

Originally Posted by johnscarlet

Its too early for Chrimbo , come back next week . Closing . lets see how many of you bite

Bah humbug... too EARLY.

...our Makro was selling Xmas decorations 5 months ago.

(And I've already done half my Xmas shopping)

[Mep]

doh!

[johnscarlet]

Originally Posted by partyweb

Bah humbug... too EARLY.

...our Makro was selling Xmas decorations 5 months ago.

(And I've already done half my Xmas shopping)

one

[partyweb]

Originally Posted by johnscarlet

one

Yup, that'll be that Lost S3 dvd box set that the other half has 'bought' me.


Seriously though. I tend to start my Xmas shopping in October. Whenever I see something going cheap in a sale that looks just right for someone in particular I get it then and put it away til Xmas. Helps spread the cost and also means I buy something that they will hopefully enjoy rather than something I bought in a last minute panic because I'm going round their house in a day or two.

[pure_geordie]

Has anybody got any ideas if the expanding universe has black holes which co exist with other parallel universes.

I think in the 13th dimension a universe is just a bubble that has other universes in it. Hopefully the M Theory will have some answers some day, but probably not in our existance.

Some people say that black holes don't exist because you can't see them.

What do you guys think.

Cheers.

[partyweb]

Anyone put their lights up yet?

A couple of houses round here have, and all our shopping centres and local shops have too.

I want to put ours up by the end of the week but am slightly put off as last year the local gang of hooligans climbed up on our front porch roof to try and pull them down. Wifey and kids were terrified. Glad I was out as I'd have been out there looking to harm one of the

So what are we all buying ourselves for Christmas?

[partyweb]

Originally Posted by pure_geordie

Has anybody got any ideas if the expanding universe has black holes which co exist with other parallel universes.

I think in the 13th dimension a universe is just a bubble that has other universes in it. Hopefully the M Theory will have some answers some day, but probably not in our existance.

Some people say that black holes don't exist because you can't see them.

What do you guys think.

Cheers.

I think the 'Xmas' I'm referring to is an abbreviation of a seasonal event rather than some quantum physics variable.

[Leej]

Originally Posted by pure_geordie

Has anybody got any ideas if the expanding universe has black holes which co exist with other parallel universes.

I think in the 13th dimension a universe is just a bubble that has other universes in it. Hopefully the M Theory will have some answers some day, but probably not in our existance.

Some people say that black holes don't exist because you can't see them.

What do you guys think.

Cheers.

Does Santa come through them?

One Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and is startled by a beautiful 19 year old blonde.
She asks "Santa, will you stay with me?"
Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go! I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"
She takes off her nightgown, and wearing only a bra and panties, she asks
"Santa, now will you stay with me?"
Santa says, "Ho Ho Ho I gotta go, gotta go! I gotta deliver these toys to the children, y'know!"
She takes off everything and asks "Santa, now will you stay with me?"
Santa replies "Hey Hey I gotta stay, gotta stay! I can't get up the chimney with my d*ck this way!"

[pure_geordie]

Originally Posted by leej

Does Santa come through them?

Well done. I think he must cos i've not seen him

Anyway here's one. Which film has the Ockham's razor quoted in it.

Going to put up all my decorations this Sunday, Well me wifee is.

Also Buying a PSP/PS3 this christmas

Also there is no known variable of "Xmas" in QP.

Ta.

Also here's a £3 off voucher code for Game "Gifts"
http://www.vouchercodes.com/voucherpages/game.htm

Merry Xmis

[dBrowne]

Originally Posted by jackal

So what are we all buying ourselves for Christmas?

My eldest wants a Squeezebox 3. My youngest hasn't mentioned anything yet.

[partyweb]

Originally Posted by pure_geordie

...Anyway here's one. Which film has the Ockham's razor quoted in it...

That'll be Contact.

[pure_geordie]

Good, whats the theorm then?

[pure_geordie]

Everything being = the simplest ! tends to b the right 1.

[dBrowne]

Originally Posted by pure_geordie

Everything being = the simplest ! tends to b the right 1.

No.

When two women came before King Ockham each claiming to be the real mother of a newborn baby and asked him to adjudicate, he took the child from them and threatened to cut it in half and give them a piece each. The real mother, fearing for her little one's well-being, fell at His Majesty's feet and beseeched him for it to be given instead to the other woman. This favour, in his wisdom and mercy, he did oblige, but not without first slicing off the wee one's left hand to give to the mother as a memento of her sacrifice and a reward for not wasting any more of the king's time.

So Ockham's razor is invoked whenever you have sought justice and yet, though you have been granted what you so earnestly begged for, somehow it still doesn't feel quite right.

[Achy]

What winds me up about Xmas is when people say "the true meaning of Christmas is being lost".... what is the true meaning of Christmas/Xmas ?

Christians say it is to celebrate the birth of Christ.... hmmm.... But the pagan rituals of Yuletide, Winter solstice, Green Trees, Mistletoe etc - were hijacked by the Romans when they saw the Saxons having a knees up in December.

Why does religion have to come into it?

Christmas is what you make it.
Sharing it with the people you love/like/(can put up with the day), and taking some time off from work (if you're lucky !)

So Merry Xmas everyone !

[Nimby]

Merry Xmax.

[Decadence]

yeah...Merry Xbox!

[njp]

Originally Posted by dBrowne

When two women came before King Ockham each claiming to be the real mother of a newborn baby and asked him to adjudicate, he took the child from them and threatened to cut it in half and give them a piece each. The real mother, fearing for her little one's well-being, fell at His Majesty's feet and beseeched him for it to be given instead to the other woman. This favour, in his wisdom and mercy, he did oblige, but not without first slicing off the wee one's left hand to give to the mother as a memento of her sacrifice and a reward for not wasting any more of the king's time.

So Ockham's razor is invoked whenever you have sought justice and yet, though you have been granted what you so earnestly begged for, somehow it still doesn't feel quite right.

Er, what? You seem to have muddled up the medieval English philosopher and Franciscan monk William of Ockham (or Occam) with King Solomon from the bible...

King Solomon made the dodgy child custody judgement. Occam merely asserted that entities should not be multiplied unnecessarily: "Pluralitas non est ponenda sine neccesitate". He also got himself excommunicated by Pope John XXII, who he then denounced as a heretic.

Actually, Solomon's judgement wasn't that dodgy. He didn't cut the hand off.